confused and hopelessly in love ...

[chardude]

I'm a 23 year old guy head over heels in love with this gorgeous 18 yr old girl. We have a good understanding, both of us like each other, great companionship and stuff. Thing is that i've been hurt in previous relationships and have trust issues with the fairer sex, she on the other hand hasn't had a serious relationship thus far. She's shy & I hate to admit that I'm very shy as well I dont want to rush her or anything, but this state is killing me. She did agree that we should give it a shot but wants to keep this to ourselves for the moment. Says she doesnt want other people to interfere !!! (cant understand that). Its making me feel kind of insecure. A bit weird for me, meanwhile her friends are trying to fix her up with someone else and this irks me to no end. You might think this letter's from someone from the 1800's but shy people do still exist. I dont know how to handle this situation, how do i earn her trust, how do I instil confidence in her to accept me in all senses of the word (can i actually do that)?

Has anyone gone through this kind of situation before?

Alex.

[funsounds]

ask her how and who would interfere if people knew you were interested in each other and wanted to start dating. it's no necessarily a big deal right now at all...but could be in the future.

other than that...just take things slow. trust is built over time. eventually, she'll come to trust you if show yourself to be a trustworthy person.

[chardude]

Hi Funsounds,

Thanks for your reply. She's kind of under peer pressure from her flatmates, people she says dont really understand her. Personaly i'm not too fond of them, they have no clue of whats going on between us. I have no clue why she care so much about thier opinions, but i guess I would like her to sort herself out. Actually she does care about me I do know about that, she wants to take it nice and slow ... beileve me i'm very gentle and caring myself.

Its is so unnatural for me to be so insecure ...I'm very active in my social life but very clumsy when it comes to love.I just hope that I'm not going to loose her in the process

Is there a "magic portion" out there that'll put me out of my misery...

[MastaPDiddy]

Is there a "magic portion" out there that'll put me out of my misery...

If you find anything like that ill pay u everything i have for some of it.

[chardude]

If you find anything like that ill pay u everything i have for some of it.

read ur thread Masta, i guess u're going thru more than me right now. Been in a similar situation before. Relationships aren't easy i guess, setting up or winding down, but most of us dont deserve to be alone either. Good luck with ur future, mate.

[Hugo Pickle]

Going to post this in Bluevette style.

I'm a 23 year old guy head over heels in love with this gorgeous 18 yr old girl

Tone it down stud or your going to act like a dumb ass around her.

Thing is that I’ve been hurt in previous relationships and have trust issues with the fairer sex

Trust is earned. If you keep it that way, then you shouldn’t have a problem

I hate to admit that I'm very shy as well

Use your hand to feel down below your stomach and try to find a flash sack called your balls, then remember that you have a pair.

Says she doesn’t want other people to interfere !!! (cant understand that).

She is afraid people (her friends) will make fun of her for liking you, not good at all. You need to work out, get some confidence and be a man.

Its making me feel kind of insecure

See other line above...

meanwhile her friends are trying to fix her up with someone else and this irks me to no end

They don’t like you, she is unsure that she really likes you, you are unsure yourself, better man up or you will lose for sure.

I don’t know how to handle this situation, how do I earn her trust, how do I instil confidence in her to accept me in all senses of the word

You are born a child, you grow into a boy, but you have to work to become a man.

It’s time you started to become one. How? Read my other posts and that of other people on the forum. I recommend bluevetteracer and a few others.

[chardude]

Going to post this in Bluevette style.


Tone it down stud or your going to act like a dumb ass around her.


Trust is earned. If you keep it that way, then you shouldn’t have a problem


Use your hand to feel down below your stomach and try to find a flash sack called your balls, then remember that you have a pair.


She is afraid people (her friends) will make fun of her for liking you, not good at all. You need to work out, get some confidence and be a man.


See other line above...


They don’t like you, she is unsure that she really likes you, you are unsure yourself, better man up or you will lose for sure.



You are born a child, you grow into a boy, but you have to work to become a man.

It’s time you started to become one. How? Read my other posts and that of other people on the forum. I recommend bluevetteracer and a few others.

Thanks Hugo. Although I haven't gone all out and become a "stud" overnight by being overassertive (i'm certain 2 loose her that way), we spent a couple of nights together. Slowly, gently as some of u suggested, i'm gaining(earning) her trust. I think we might have something going for the both of us, she wants it just as much a I do .

Thanks again dudes.

[kristonita]

she sounds kind of shallow. if you really love this girl and want to keep her, i suggest that you assert yourself and tell her that being kept a secret isn't working for you because being in a relationship that you are forced to hide is tiring and misleading. i'd feel insecure too.