When do you walk????

**disheartened** · 28-03-06, 05:30 PM

My Boyfriend and i are getting married in 8 months but i'm really starting to wonder if i can live like this... He gets angry for no reason and yells at me, tells me i'm stupid or useless but always says hes sorry, usually he only gets angry over something stupid like he cant find his puffer or the door on the dishwasher wont close, really stupid stuff. he's really loving but i keep wondering what will set him off next, he's even worse when he drinks but has NEVER hit me. when i talk about wanting to stay at home with our kids when he have them he tells me i will do what i'm told and i just feel like i have no say in anything. we moved 4 1/2 hrs away from all our family and friends because he wanted a job that paid more money and we buy everything he wants eg. boat, motorboike, ute... but i have never asked for anything, i know it sounds like i'm letting him walk all over me but i tell him off for speaking to me like he does but i dont seem to be getting through.

If he loves me as much as he says he does why does he treat me like i'm a second class citizen? i'm not ugly or dumb. i do love him.

Any Advice????

**Gigabitch** · 29-03-06, 12:14 AM

When do you walk? You walk NOW. Today.

He has never hit you YET, and that's because you're still in a position to leave. When you're married with two kids, he'll be beating the crap out of you, and them too.

He treats you like a second class citizen because you let him. You'll be third class soon if you don't leave.

Why are you reading this? You should be packing. And make sure you have some people there with you when you're moving out, or you might not make it out the door.

**blue** · 29-03-06, 12:29 AM

run run far far away!!!

**vashti** · 29-03-06, 12:55 AM

::Jeezus, when will women stop putting up with a$$holes like this?::

You get to CHOOSE your life. Make some GOOD choices.

**Late_vamp** · 29-03-06, 01:46 AM

dont walk , run fast ...

**xwfuro** · 29-03-06, 03:08 AM

Originally Posted by Gigabitch

When do you walk? You walk NOW. Today.

He has never hit you YET, and that's because you're still in a position to leave. When you're married with two kids, he'll be beating the crap out of you, and them too.

He treats you like a second class citizen because you let him. You'll be third class soon if you don't leave.

Why are you reading this? You should be packing. And make sure you have some people there with you when you're moving out, or you might not make it out the door.

uhm thats just about exactly it.. once u have that marriage title thats when the hitting starts, you may love him but this is a bad look get away.

***Tweedy*** · 29-03-06, 05:38 AM

Yes i totally agree, you need to walk!!!

Don't put up with that sh!$, if he loved you he would'nt hurt you like that!!

**RogerWilco** · 30-03-06, 12:07 AM

Not to berate "disheartened" in any way shape or form, but this is honestly a prime example of "what the **** is wrong with women in general??"

I'll just never understand the thought process behind things like this. I don't mean to come off like a misogynist or a jerk, and I know many/most women aren't like that, but it's the ones that would even consider staying that really make me wonder.

In all seriousness and sincerity, disheartened, please walk NOW. This "man" (and I use the term verrrrrrrry loosely) is nothing but trouble.

This is obviously a "worst case scenario", but check this out:

[url]http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive...contract1.html[/url]

Some of the things there really send chills up my spine.

**gingerbabe86** · 31-03-06, 03:27 PM

Ask u'rself.. do u love him to the point that if he does hit u, once u get married, u won't leave? If u can't take the risks of being in this relationship then walk away now. It's as simple as that. Lots of ppl experience this before they get married too, u have to decide if u want to have kids with this man u love and spend the rest of u'r life with him. Or leave him now, and hopefully u'll find someone better later in life. It's u'r decision not ours. We can't tell u if u should or shouldn't leave him because we're not u. U'r the one that loves him not us.

**glitterbeachie** · 07-04-06, 06:39 AM

I just wanted to reply because my boyfriend is also just like this! You are not the only one

And I know everyone says just walk away, my friends always say this to me, but I know from experience it is not always that easy! Little things set my boyfriend off too...and I'm talking LITTLE things, like my raising my voice the wrong way or just about anything. And my boyfriend NEVER apoligizes for his fits of rage...in fact, he hever acknowleges he is wrong. Usually, when he is at the peak he seems really disillusioned about what really happens and seems to think I am the one who causes the problems, yells at him, or is wrong. It's strange because he somehow wants me to take the blame for every angry personality nuance HE displays. And considering I am a pretty mind-mannered girl, I wonder how he can be so blind. But ANYWAY, before I got off track,

I just wanted to say I understand your relationship, because mine is sort of like that too. And, even though everyone says just walk away, I know it's not that easy especially if you love the person. I hope that helps, even if you can just read it and know someone else out there also puts up with the same things. Men are so tempramental! Does your guy take any of those crazy work-out supplements or anything, because I know mine does and they really mess with his emotions and make him crazy and very easy to set-off and explode his emotions.

**confused01** · 07-04-06, 08:11 AM

i believe and i agree with others run away baby, he ain't changing and how long can you stand living like that?
it's only 8months and he is like that already what's going to happen when he gets tired of this relationship he won't give a damn to you(in my opinion). walk away dear and also get someone to help you, your parents or freindss not only one but few that can stand out there when he gets mad or something. concentrate on your life your futur and yourself man are so selfish sometimes .
that's my point of you

**Gigabitch** · 07-04-06, 10:40 PM

We haven't heard from disheartened for a while. Ominous silence....

**confused01** · 08-04-06, 01:06 AM

maybe she did it and run away!!!

**Tiay** · 10-04-06, 09:44 AM

or maybe he took her internet.. maybe my imagination is running away with me but this just creeps me out.

Disheartened.. I agree-- RUN NOW! You've already made a crucial step in recognising that his treatment of you is not normal, and not right. Don't dismiss it, you KNOW it's not right. Women who stay in bad relationships often let themselves believe that this is just how things are meant to be. You deserve better. NEVER let anybody get away with telling you that you're stupid-- you make them right if you let them.

My b/f totally spoils me, tells me I'm beautiful and intelligent (even though i'm just average in both categories) and I have never seen him loose his temper, he's never shouted at me, ever. Of course he's not perfect.... but damn he's close.
sorry.. had to go on that tangent

if you're reading this, please give us an update!

**Sinsemilla** · 10-04-06, 09:43 PM

Get away now!

There is absolutly no reason for you to stay with him, he doesn't really love you, he doesn't deserve you.

when i talk about wanting to stay at home with our kids when he have them he tells me i will do what i'm told

Don't hang on to someone like this, there are plenty of caring, loving guys out there...Don't ruin your own life...

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