Just seeking some opinions...

[GWarren]

I have not been on here in forever. A lot has happened since then. Anyways...I will try to keep this short. I found this girl and everything in my life changed for the better, I had never been happier and never had she. I had emotional and communicational problems as a child and a teenager(parents divorce, I had to do everything myself). I had to solve all my problems myself. I never let anyone in my life until I met Amy. I opened up to her and let out 10 yrs of anger, frustration, and I was the happiest man alive. She was my first real relationship, so I was not used to much. After 3 months, we already knew we wanted to marry eachother, we fell in love pretty fast.

Anyways, times changed, I had to adjust. I got upset pretty fast and blew things out of proportion. But I changed, I realized I didnt need to see her all day everyday. Every so often I would start stupid little arguements with her, and I could never find out the problem. So it was like I was a kid again, not being able to solve my own problems. So I started to act different, which made her different, then back to me, etc... Anyways, it took me months to finally realize that the problems within me were causing me to start the arguements. I was too busy trying to find a problem with her since Mr. Know-it-all here is never wrong. I solved all my problems with our relationship. Her problem with me was that I was too attached...as I was. I realized I needed to change that. I realized there was more to life besides school and Amy. I knew I had to change. However, I just pushed those stupid arguements too long, and I pushed her away. She told me she just needed a break, her alone time, which is understandable since I was too attached. So I took it as being we will take a break...she will think, then she will let me know if she wants to try again. But a few days later, she said we are broken up. I was confusing the whole meaning of on a break and breaking up. She's not saying that we wont get back together, but she's also not saying that we definitely will. I just need to give her her time and space. That is why it is so hard for me. Im a problem solver, I know what my problems with myself as a person and a boyfriend are. I know what her problems with me are. I accepted full responsibility for this break up. I am mainly disappointed in myself for not realizing what I was doing earlier. Yeah, so I just have to wait. We both always say we love eachother so much. We used to say we were the ones for eachother. Because of how I acted, she started to question that.

I guess after I did all this rambling and you guys got bored of reading it, i just wanted to know your guys' opinion. From your past knowledge and experiences, how often do couples get back together? I dont know how long it 'might' take, so I don't need to ask that.

All I can do is hope that she starts to miss me. She even said that. After she has her space, if she starts to miss me, and she wants to give it another shot, then she will come back. We were together for 1.5 yrs. Hopefully I did enough good in that time so she can miss me.

I mean seriously, I did not do anything horrible. I just couldn't realize that I was at fault. How often is it when I man accepts all the blame for everything that has happened, and then he changes everything he was doing wrong? Geez...I don't know. I just have to keep myself busy for a while and try not to think about her. Yeah, this wasn't really a short one, sorry about that.

Graham

[vashti]

First relationships are supposed to be a time of learning and growth, and it looks like you are on the right path. No one knows if she will eventually take you back; you can't un-ring a bell. I think you ought to continue learning about yourself and growing so you will be better prepared for your next relationship.

[GWarren]

I know. I have learned a whole lot about myself. But Amy and I have come so far. We have been through so much together. I'm just going to have to keep busy and not think about it. Hopefully...she will want to be with me again. I know this sounds like a normal thing...for someone to not let go. But this is different, we were planning on getting married. Everything has already happened between us. I just have to hope that after the stupid stuff that happened, it didn't damage anything beyond repair. Time needs to speed up...ehhhhhh

[vashti]

I personally think you were a bit young to be talking about getting married anyway. Most men aren't ready until they are at least 30.

Listen, I know the first heartbreak is difficult to get through, but if you continue being introspective, the time you spent together was not wasted. You will learn a lot from this relationship if you allow yourself to, and in time will probably have a more objective perspective. Right now it sounds like you are pretty desperate and just trying to hold on, but trying to hang on will not get you the results you are hoping for.

Things will get better; you'll see. Hang in there. Take some time for yourself. Take up a hobby or do something constructive with your time.

Good luck.