Need a female's thoughts!

[Pun1sher]

Alright. I'm 16 years old and i've always been the type of person to just stay away of relationships because I always tell myself it won't last because i'm so young, and we'd break up no matter what. So instead of having reltionships, I just hook up with girls, not a lot, just some. But sometimes when I hook up with girls I start to have feelings for them, and sometimes it bothers me. I don't even try to prevent a reltionship from happening, it just does.

Me and this girl hangout all the time and we hold hands and call eachother lover and all that, and now I feel that I like her. She tells me i'm different from all guys i've been with, and I tell her she's different from all the girls i've been with. We just hungout on her lake today and we were tanning on this huge tube she has and we kissed a lot and all that like we always do, and we held hands, and just doing those things so much just makes me have feelings for her. She said call her later and I am after I finish up some summer reading, which she knows i'm goona do. I just text her to see what she's doing and how her brother is (he came back from florida tonight) and she hasen't text back, but I know she's goona text back and tell me why she hasen't yet, even though it's been like 10 mins lol. Anyways, now that i'm just chillen home, I really feel like I miss her, I don't even know why. It's like i'm not trying to start a reltionship cuz it will end, we're so young, and at the same time we still talk everynight and call eachother lover. I just love to hangout and hook up with this girl, which is why i'm still talking to her. I don't hookup with a lot of girls, I don't really try to. At random times I just feel so sad, I don't know why. I know i'm an emotional kid, and i'm really nice to though. I dunno, I just feel sad now for some reason. Maybe I miss her? Hm...

[King Zarathu]

Relationships--Even though you're young and you're right, you will break up; the learning experience is priceless. With every relationship, you learn at least something. I wouldn't trade the lessons I've learned for anything.

[thinker]

First things first, it's probably not a wise idea to just be "hooking up with girls" at your age. Back in the day you weren't even allowed to court women until your 20s... times have changed, sure, but you will not want to have this kind of reputation and the sheer numbers of "hookups" as you get into more serious relationships later in life. Who will want to date someone who has never had a gf but has made out with handfuls of chicks? Just serisouly consider that for your future.

Secondly, just because statistics say you are too young to have a lifelong relationship, that is certainly no reason to not have one! Are you expecting to wait until you're 26 then find the one girl you will marry and date only her? Doesn't work that way man. With each relationship we grow and learn more about ourselves so that future relationships will be better and more meaningful. If I were you, I would tell this girl you are hanging out with that you want to have a relationship... I mean you DO like eachother... no harm in "going out" even if you both know it will most likely not last for 14 or whatever years until you are old enough to get married. We form relationships with people we have feelings for to explore and expand upon those feelings. Lol don't feel the enormous pressure of finding the "one" person for you just yet! Its high school (I assume) so get out there and open yourself up. Follow your heart and feelings, knowing that they will very likely get hurt, but its all part of the growing process. Just dont take it too seriously quite yet... can't wait 10 minutes for a girl to call and still doing summer readings... probably not the maturity level ready for a serious relationship, no offense Just tell her how you really feel and let things go from there! Good luck

[Ellynn]

Its ok to have relationships at your age. Just realize that it may not be for the long haul. Its good to have that experience and just to have fun! Thats what being young is all about. Plus, you always learn something from a relationship, whether it ends up good or bad.

[vashti]

I'm not sure how you define "hook up". I've seen it used as either hanging around with someone or a euphmism for casual sex.

If you are having casual sex with random girls, then that is obviously not a good idea.

If you are just hanging out with random girls, that is perfectly fine at your age, and in my opinion, is healthy. It will give you experience relating to the opposite sex, and you will learn (hopefully) what qualities you find important in the opposite sex, and what you should look for in a long-term partner when you grow up. Also, as Ellyn says, it is an amazing opportunity to learn about relationships in general, even though, as you already know, they won't last.

I think you feel sad when you are away from this girl because you LIKE her and enjoy the way you feel when she is around. This is normal, and also very sweet.

[Junket]

Alright. I'm 16 years old and i've always been the type of person to just stay away of relationships because I always tell myself it won't last because i'm so young

I made that same mistake.

And all it does is leave you inexperienced and unprepared later on.

Take advantage of this time to at least learn a few things.

Even if it doesn't last.

[Pun1sher]

First things first, it's probably not a wise idea to just be "hooking up with girls" at your age. Back in the day you weren't even allowed to court women until your 20s... times have changed, sure, but you will not want to have this kind of reputation and the sheer numbers of "hookups" as you get into more serious relationships later in life. Who will want to date someone who has never had a gf but has made out with handfuls of chicks? Just serisouly consider that for your future.

Secondly, just because statistics say you are too young to have a lifelong relationship, that is certainly no reason to not have one! Are you expecting to wait until you're 26 then find the one girl you will marry and date only her? Doesn't work that way man. With each relationship we grow and learn more about ourselves so that future relationships will be better and more meaningful. If I were you, I would tell this girl you are hanging out with that you want to have a relationship... I mean you DO like eachother... no harm in "going out" even if you both know it will most likely not last for 14 or whatever years until you are old enough to get married. We form relationships with people we have feelings for to explore and expand upon those feelings. Lol don't feel the enormous pressure of finding the "one" person for you just yet! Its high school (I assume) so get out there and open yourself up. Follow your heart and feelings, knowing that they will very likely get hurt, but its all part of the growing process. Just dont take it too seriously quite yet... can't wait 10 minutes for a girl to call and still doing summer readings... probably not the maturity level ready for a serious relationship, no offense Just tell her how you really feel and let things go from there! Good luck

Hhaahha thanks alot, that was a good reply. But the 10 min wait think, sometimes if I call her and she doesn't pick up I just have a bad feeling in me, not all the time but sometimes. This girl and the last girl I was with both said I was different from all the guys they've been with, and I think that's pretty good. So I trust her and I know she trusts me. =)

[Pun1sher]

Thanks to all you guys for the reply's, they really helped a lot. Yeah me and this girl like eachother a lot, so i'll go out with her. I just don't want to feel heart-broken if we ever break up, cuz I can be a very emotional person. Sometimes the first girl I ever liked a lot, before the one I talk to now, her name pops up in my head then I just forget about it, I don't know why haha. But I really like this girl and when we hook up I mean everything but sex. I'm a virgin and I feel I should stay that way for a while. Also, what if the relationship last for years then we break up or something? What are your thoughts about that?

[vashti]

I'm a virgin and I feel I should stay that way for a while. What are your thoughts about that?

Good idea. But quit protecting your heart quite so much. Love is not for wimps. Embrace it all as a learning experience.

[Pun1sher]

Yeah.. and you think I should care what she's done in the past? Like she used to smoke a little but like last year and she's hooked up with these 2 different guys I don't really like, but if I ever bring it up she gets all like sad. Like she regretted doing anything with either of those guys and hates when I bring it up. It doesn't really bother me but if I think it, then it kinda does a little bit then it goes way. You think I should just forget about what she's done in the past and believe her when she says she's not like that at all anymore and she'd never hook up with them ever again, even if they call she doesnt pick up or just tells them she can't hangout because me and her like eachother and she just wouldn't hook up with them again.

[vashti]

I think it is very common for people your age to make mistakes, regret them bitterly, and mature out of them. I would hate to be held accountable for things I did as a teenager.

That doesn't mean you should be a sucker - if you see signs of bad behavior, don't ignore them, but yeah, you should just move on.

[Pun1sher]

I think it is very common for people your age to make mistakes, regret them bitterly, and mature out of them. I would hate to be held accountable for things I did as a teenager.

That doesn't mean you should be a sucker - if you see signs of bad behavior, don't ignore them, but yeah, you should just move on.

Wait I should move on? They're are mistakes, and I know she regrets them because she always ignore's their calls and I can see it on her missed calls list and all of that. I trust her though, or at least i'm working to trust her. It's alright, we've talked about it and stuff and it's all good now. I like her a lot though, and there many things about her that I like.

[vashti]

Sorry, I didn't mean that you should get rid of her, but that you should "move on" about her past. I guess that was worded ambiguously.

[Junket]

Sorry, I didn't mean that you should get rid of her, but that you should "move on" about her past. I guess that was worded ambiguously.

Vash, you could've single handedly destroyed their relationship!

Gotta be careful about those things.

That's cool though isn't it?

That we have the kind of influence?

[vashti]

Well, considering the rest of my post alluded to "forgive and forget", I am hoping the original poster didn't rush right out and dump this girl. I WOULD feel awful about that.