Please Tell What I Should Do?

[tango747]

hello ppl...i will try to be as honest about my situation as possible. i know this great girl that goes to the same college as i do. She is currently a good friend of mine and i like her a lot. She is the same age as i am. I cannot say she is the center of attention at my college but not is she unpopular. She has a lot of friends...a lot of them being other guys, a fact which makes me sort of uncomfortable. To a certain extent, i am rather shy guy and asking her out just seems so unbeleivable to me. She is so much more independent that i am....i mean she is always out (not that i never go out but she is ALWAYS with some1...) workin till 11 am in a chic clothes store, hangin out with other guys (clubbin and that sort of stuff....). The problem is that clubbin is just not really my thing, i actually never really tried but still---out till 4 am just doesnt seem to fit right in my head. All i want is just for some of u ppl to give me some ideas as to how to approach her, how make be a little more interested in me. I want to know how to deal with a girl that is so much more "out there" ...almost as if i cannot fit her "all too self confident mature lifestyle". Thank you for any helpful sugestions that u might have. All help will be greatly appreciated. Thank you all.

[sfalexi]

I voted 19.

Seriously though, aside from the fact that you somehow managed to post a poll with odd numbers in it (PUN PUN PUN!), you have to just approach her. I mean, you can't just ask for her number, you do have to get her interested in you. So basically, yo uhave to talk to her. As wierd as it may seem, you have to find some way, some reason to talk to her. You could just be walking in the same direction and just talk to her. "Hey. Where are you headed? I get to go to history class." Wait for a response. If she really doesn't want anything to do with you, she'll keep her mouth shut and ignore you. If she doesn't have anything against you, she'll respond and strike up a friendly conversation. Then you just have to be funny, and smile (when you smile you will ALWAYS get a smile back and it makes them feel just a little bit better and friendlier towards you). After having a good conversation or two, one day mention that you're going to get something to eat and if she'd like to join you. If she's busy, say "How about tomorrow then? What time is good for you?" That's a make or break line. Then you'll know if she's interested or not.

Alexi

[LightOn]

I voted 21,

Tango, are you sure you can handle someone into the clubbing scene? Would you expect her to change her lifestyle for you?

[lemonade69]

i personally do not think clubbing makes you 'SOOO' much more 'out there' as you seem to think. seriously, it is just a source of entertainment for people who like loud music and dancing. i do not think that the fact she clubs will damage your chances to be with her. i started clubbing at 16, most girls in my school, 15. but i will not turn down a guy simply because he doesn't club! there are sooo many more factors out there to consider when you are trying to decide whether a relationships with someone will work! soo....approach her, start a conversation...

good luck!

[Illusional]

first off....lemonade, i love your icon.

secondly tango, i think that you're focusing too much on her opposites rather that what the two of you might have in common. she is your friend so it would be that much easier to start up a conversation with her. for example, talk about school, how things are going at work, whatever. you already have an advantage in that you're not a stranger and she will talk to you if you approach her.

with the differences in personalities, you never know.. maybe a shy guy is what she needs because she's around a lot of clubbers and that's not really what she is looking for. being around a crowd of people with the same interests can get boring, trust me. what i look for in a girl is that she is well not completely opposite, but we must have our differences. differences keep people guessing what will happen next and it keeps a relationship exciting. i think that you have just as good a chance as any of her other friends because where you lack they will make up, but it works in both ways. remember what they lack, you possess. raverboy

[lemonade69]

Originally posted by Illusional
first off....lemonade, i love your icon.

heehee thnx! i went through all the icons to find this one...(yes, i was very bored..)

[jane]

I voted 19.. only because sometimes its worth going and not drinking until you really have figured out the scene... I don't know where you live but on the East Coast.. clubbing can be pretty dangerous and when you drink its only amplified.. but hey.. who knows anyway.