Help me get over my ex-boyfriend!

[Jenasis7776]

I have this huge problem and i dont know what to do...its a long story so here it goes...I dated this guy for 3 years on and off and i loved him, but was never "in love" with him. at the beginning, everything was perfect...we got along, he was awesome, and then after about 3 months he started to turn on me...he threw things at the wall and went crazy, then a few months after that it worsened, and he pulled my hair to throw me out of his apartment, was verbally abusive towards me and raped me several times but got more excited when id say stop...anyways, things finally ended at the end of July, and he ended it with me by accusing me of cheating on him. 3 days later he met a 17 year old girl and they have been dating ever since. i heard from people that he treated her really well. anyways, last weekend, i was drunk and called him and he said he wanted me and loved me etc. about a half hour later, he called me and came and picked me up...he grabbed me and made out with me and made it clear that this was just about sex, which i was fine with me at the time. he said sweet things to me and we reminiced, and he just stared at me. he said that his girlfriend is a prude and he hadnt even tried to have sex with her, and that he loved her, but was not "in love" with her, and we had sex multiple times when we were both drunk and sober. i had the girls number, so i text messaged her and told her what happened because he told me that he wasnt going to tell her, and i felt totally guilty. i gave her specific proof - things that only i would know if i was with him, so that she would believe me. she said she didnt and that was the end of it...even though he was a complete ass in the morning when he brought me home and i definitely dont want him back after that and seeing what kind of person he is, i still cant seem to get completely over him. I don't know what made me so horrible that he would treat me so bad, and her so good...will he eventually treat her the same way he treated me? They;ve been going out for less than 2 months and he already cheated on her...what is going on? and how do i get over him for good? ANY ADVICE OR COMMENTS WOULD BE GREAT BECAUSE I AM HAVING A HARD TIME GETTING OVER THIS!

[Mathias]

1. Report him to the cops. He committed a felony.
2. Get counseling. Seriously.
3. NEVER talk to him again.

[Jenasis7776]

Any more comments or advice guys? i want to get over this but i dont know how...

[King Zarathu]

Yes, I have a lot of things to say.

1. Report him to the cops. He committed a felony.
2. Get counseling. Seriously.
3. NEVER talk to him again.

[derm]

You're finding it hard to forget him after he verbally, physically and sexually abuses you. Gees girl what will you do when someone who's nice to you actually ends a relationship.

He may appear to be nice to his new GF but who knows whats going on behind the scene. I don't think people like that ever change and would be very surprised if he doesn't end up treating his present GF the very same.

He sounds like he's trouble, count yourself lucky you got out, and start feeling sorry for his new GF

There's only one way to get over a guy. Thats get under another!

[E-Hero Candyman]

Mathias and Zarathu is right about most of comments made. Although I dont necessarily agree with number 2. Counselling doesnt work for everyone. It really depends on the person.

It doesnt sound like you had done anything to deserve how you were treated. It's likely the guy is just an ass. He is the kind of guy that gives all us guys a bad name. Particularly us super nice guys who cant even get one girl.

Firstly Rape is Rape. It is a crime. Report him, and while you are at it get a restraining order. It sounds like it's been a while since he had done that and since then you have said you were "fine" with what the two of you had done while he had another girlfriend. So it may come down to your word against his. I know very little about the laws and other things, etc, concern these matters.

If he does call again, a retraining order will come in handy.

[Gigabitch]

You need to restrain yourself. What the **** is wrong with you, girl? I remember you from before- and you know what?

YOU DON'T ****ING LISTEN.

My advice: Leave town and lose his phone number. You are terrible for each other.

[Jenasis7776]

thanks for being so supportive-i dont know why this is so hard on me, but it is...stupidly, i wasted my time, and i really want to get over this...

[Gigabitch]

thanks for being so supportive-i dont know why this is so hard on me, but it is...stupidly, i wasted my time, and i really want to get over this...

Good- start by promising yourself that you will never, ever call him again. Get an exorcism if you have to.

[vashti]

Is it just me, or am I the last person in the world who thinks you can't rape the willing?

Frankly, your post just pisses me off because it diminishes the experience REAL rape victims suffer when they are attacked. Who in their right mind would want to continue in any sort of relationship with their rapist? No one, that's who.

You two sound perfect for each other to me.

[derm]

Is it just me, or am I the last person in the world who thinks you can't rape the willing?

Frankly, your post just pisses me off because it diminishes the experience REAL rape victims suffer when they are attacked. Who in their right mind would want to continue in any sort of relationship with their rapist? No one, that's who.

You two sound perfect for each other to me.

In Japan I'm not sure you can rape anybody willing or unwilling

Girls accept it and rarely if ever report it

[Gigabitch]

In Japan I'm not sure you can rape anybody willing or unwilling

Girls accept it and rarely if ever report it

She's not in Japan, or she wouldn't have texted his new gf.

[Mathias]

Is it just me, or am I the last person in the world who thinks you can't rape the willing?

Frankly, your post just pisses me off because it diminishes the experience REAL rape victims suffer when they are attacked. Who in their right mind would want to continue in any sort of relationship with their rapist? No one, that's who.

Sadly, this isn't true.

[derm]

She's not in Japan, or she wouldn't have texted his new gf.

I know, just stating a fact

Don't agree with it but the Jap guys do. They are so rude to their women and treat them like second class citizens

[Gigabitch]

I know, just stating a fact

Don't agree with it but the Jap guys do. They are so rude to their women and treat them like second class citizens

So do more than half the men in the world. I am so grateful to be living in this country, crazy as it is here.