i dont know what to think

[standing]

PLEASE READ IT; IT WAS DIFFICULT TO ME TO WRITE IT

Hi all,


First of all, im from spain and my english is not very good but ill try to explain my problem, and hope you understand me, and my feelings

well, i am 18, i have never been with a girl (i mean that i have never have a girlfriend) but i have had some "affairs" wwith some girls. you know what i mean... (im not proud of that, i really want to have a girlfriend)

well, my problem is that i dont know how to reaccionate
ok.
i am talking about a girl

Ihave seen that girl 3 times in my life, but all those times we were in a party and a little bit drunk lol hehehe
well, the first time we met, a friend presented us and without any kind of presentation we began to kiss ourselfs. it was amazing, but as i told you, we were drunk. very drunk
one of the first problems comes when, some months ago we met again. i really didnt remember her, but a friend told me that she was the girl with whom i had that "short relationship". and i suddenly remember it. so i asked her if we have met before in that party (i didnt say anything about the kiss of course) but she seemed no to remember... (but i thing she is liyng ^^, thats a personal feeling, i think she remembers it)
this time, we were also in another party, and drunk . yes again...
and we stayed ALL the night holding our hands or our waists, but i didnt kiss her i dont know why.

so in that moment i tought that i liked her! but i thought it was only a one night realtionship for her. and for me too.but she came to me, thats important.

she also told me that i had a similiar appearance of one frind of hers, who was "really sexy"
she told me that to many times, and i dont know what to think, because, well if that guy is sexy, and i am like him I am sexy, or not? jejejeok
but in the other hand, is not a good feeling to feel compared all the time. like if she was with me because i was like that guy

after that party i forgot again her. and some months later, i met again in another party! YES AGAIN; AND DRUNK AGAIN. not proud of that

in that party SHE recognised me!, and again we spent all the night together, but because of some problems i coudnt kiss her > <
BUT, that day she gave me her Messenger and telephone number. so i didnt forgot her this time, because we talk by messenger almost every day. and we have long conversations. incredibly long.

So, after some weeks talking,yesterday she told me that she was not going to go to her university, and told me to spent the morning with her!
wow, i said yes, and i didnt go to university too.of course. i really didnt know what we were goinf todo all the morning together, or even what were we going to talk about. we really dont meet ourself that good to be a FULL morning together.

but i was happy, and we spent all this morning together...
it was extrange (HERE COMES MY HUGE DOUBTS).
first of all i had the fear not to like her. because all the times she have seen me she was drunk!, and when you are drunk you see people more handsome than they are... you know... and well, she is a very bautifull and sexy girl, and i am a normal boy, not tall, thin, and i have a normal face, maybe a little handsome, but not very much... and I also have a little bit of acne, and i thought she really didnt know it

SO, i didnt know what she expected me to be, but i had fear to dissapoint her. (i dont have a very a high self steem, have I?)

(but in that moment i had enough to think that i liked her. or not????)
i dont ask a girl that I dont know very good to stay a morning with me...
well, the problem is that the morning didnt go very good.
all the places we went to, were closed, and they were very far. we walked A LOT! there was nobody in the street, a lot of wind and even rained a little bit.. so we staid in a situation of not knowing what to do. really uncomfortable in this situation, isnt it?
in the other hand. we didnt get bored, we talked a lot and laugh a lot, and didnt get out of conversation (which was my fear)

but the bad luck was with us that day, and as i told you, things didnt go very good because of the weather etc.
so we stayed a lot of time like this:
i told: "and what do we do now??"
she:"i dont know. i dont care"

I DONT CARE, i hate that sentence. but eventhough she took it with laughs

so my feelings were , "she seems to be happy, but i have the feeling that she is regreting of coming with me"
because in that moment she could have been with her friends, but she was with ME, alone, and getting bored in a bank....
that was my feeling of course.

i think you can undersantd what i mean. and my feelings

AND now, what do i do?
did She get dissapointed with my appearence? i really think she did a little
at the end of the morning she went with a smile in the mouth, but i had a strange feeling, a very uncomfortable feeling. like if she was regreting of have come (as i told you before)


i dont know what to do now, maybe wait is reaction

please girls of the forum, try to help me with this.i have no expierienve in this and dont want to get illusions.
im not still "after her" so, i dont want to say anything because she can be a very good friend, but I NEED to have things clear

byebye wait you answers, i know is long and in bad english, but please read it

[anachronistic]

you sound a lot younger than someone going to a university. especially with all those damn typos.

but anyways, she probably didn't appreciate your saying 'well what do we do now', but that really depends on the tone. so dont get mad because she said waht she said.

anyways, i strongly discourage meeting girls at a party like that. i also strongly discourage going to parties

basically you will feel like that, unless you make contact with her. ask her if she likes you, and if she doesnt, move on. its a fricken girl you met at a party, remember that. thats all she is right now. it's not like she is a best friend or anything. she isnt a close acquaintance so don't take it so darn seriously. you'd be doing yourself a favor

[Gigabitch]

Why are making her do all of the work, here? It seems like she has to be the boy in every situation. I know that you said it was important that she came to you the second time, but what about the third time? And this morning?

Your lack of self-confidence is what's going to kill this thing, not any of your other self-percieved flaws. Get over this.

Oh, and I have a message for you from your liver: "Stop drinking so much!"

[standing]

you sound a lot younger than someone going to a university. especially with all those damn typos.

well, it is not easy to explain ALL these, in engilsh for me, i put them because i really dont know if you understand what im saying, or how i am feeling. but you are right, i read it again and thats true

anyway, i am.

"Why are making her do all of the work, here? It seems like she has to be the boy in every situation. I know that you said it was important that she came to you the second time, but what about the third time? And this morning?"

i dont undestand what do you mean with that sry

"Your lack of self-confidence"
i know, but thats because i have no xperience with these things...

thank for your answers and for read it all

and i dont drink so much. what i told you happened in a long period of time, and chance (coincidence) made me find her

"she isnt a close acquaintance so don't take it so darn seriously. you'd be doing yourself a favor"
thats a good advice, thanks, thats true.
i have read it again and it sounds much more dramatic than it is but anyway...

what i want to know is if you agree with me, that is not normal that she invited me to be with her today, thats why i want you to help me understand Why did she do it...
of course i can ask her... but thats not an option by the moment

she is a very nice girl.