The girl in my lecture

[xcepshun]

Theres a girl in my third year university lecture, she sits at the front i usually sit in the middle. She sits with 2 girls so i can't really sit next to her. I did a presentation a week ago and i noticed when my other members talked she didn't look, so, i decided during my part of the presentation to be bold and take control of the class, and, to my amazement she was looking at me the whole time. Also, i heared a "good presentation at the end from her and her friends.

Now, after break she sits directly behind me b/c we have groups and shes in the group behind me, so the question is , i want to talk to her, and i duno if shes taken and i duno how to approach it.

Here are some suggestions i was given, please give me ur advice ladies.

a) Smile with eye contact during class, if you get smile back approach after class, if not, just forget it.

b) Approach her after her presentation and seem interested in her topic or ask for her help on her notes or something related to her presentation

c) Just go up to her and talk to her after class.

d) rip a peice of paper from my notebook.. on it write..... "wanna go for coffee" then have a box with "yes" "no" and "maybe" and spaces to checkmark her choice..


*I have different ppl suggesting different things, i have to pick one, so ladies please help me

[Smirnoffz]

although I'm not a lady or girl,, I'd go for answer B or C

as for answer B, just make sure you really are (a bit) interested, if you aren't interessted and you try to make it look like you're interested I think it would look a bit silly...

And well, just ask her directly if she wants to drink some coffee with you...

Hope this could help you and good luck

[genesys4]

if you're a guy(which u r), show some cojones! u said that she began to sit behind u after the presentation, right?! remove ur fear towards her by asking her "u always sit in front, Y were u on my back now? try to stalking me?!"
I had to say, don't str8away ask her 4 a date, but try removing ur fear towards her 1st so that u can talk normally, and THEN u can ask her out, that's the idea.

[Moonchild]

B will only really work if you're not faking interest. If you hate the topic or it puts you to sleep, don't try it. Also don't bother if it was an assigned topic, because she might not have quite as much interest in explaining more than she has to.

D seems a little childish to me.

Oh, and genesys4's example? Don't do that.

[Tiay]

quit fussing. It doesn't matter how *exactly* you do it, but it does matter that you seem to be scared. Don't be ^^. easier said that done, I know.

whatever you do, do it *soon*! Don't wait around, don't pretend to be her friend if you really want more. The "first i'll befriend her to take away my fear, then i'll ask her out.." strategy often leads to guys crushing on a girl for months, and when they finally pluck up the courage to ask, they're already well into the friend zone.

so don't wait around. Make contact.

All these strategies you listed.. could work, but they depend on the circumstances.

that is, eye contact and smiling is great-- but girls aren't constantly in "looking out for cute guys to date" mode, sometimes they're in a pissy "oh shit i'm late for my paper, and why the f.uck is that dude grinning at me?" mode.
Talking to a girl is not like a computer language with set values;
if eye contact = true, then execute smile. If smile back = true, then execute talktogirl.

The people giving you advice are probably telling you what would work on *them*. But is it something you'd do? Do you think option D (with the yes/no/maybe note) is childish, or do you like that kinda thing and find it cute?

don't do anything fake. If I was you, I'd try to get some non-creepy eye contact, and talk to her later. But that might just be me.

Chances are, she's taken or not interested. Do it anyway (:

[xcepshun]

Alright, i think the consensus here is , "i gotta do it". The method and choice are subjective to how i think she is as a woman and the circumstances.

The only thing that scares me is, if i get rejected, i'm gonna feel like a fool the next 5 months seeing her in class and have her whispering to her friends "oooh i shut that guy down".. i duno if girls do that, but , guys we love to brag about girls we shut down, at least i do <--- maybe thats a sign of my insecurity.

I just never ever approached a girl, every girl i've ever been with sexually or like dated has been b/c they came to me, so this is new to me, thats why i'm scared and duno how to start.