Commitment

[sarahkimble]

I'm in love with a guy. Things were moving swiftly for months, but he thought I was wrong for him. I love him, he has started seeing another girl. I had looked her up found out she works at a cancer center. My attitude is "We both could have made this work if you had made a commitment to me. If you had not given so much of your time to her and made a commitment to me. You were the One for me. You have wasted my time."

I seem to end up in a series of bad relationships. The world always makes me feel miserable at times it seems all girls have boyfriends. I don't think that I deserve to be loved. I prefer to go out with whoever wants to date me. How can I get him to see me as more than a friend and stop seeing another girl?

[bluesummer]

Wow. Look, my dear.....if he has decided he is wrong for you and has started seeing someone else, you need to leave it at that. He has moved on....why can't you? Why do you want to chase after someone who doesn't want to be with you, when you could find someone that DOES? You were only together a few months, that doesn't mean he wasted your time. This is how relationships go. You meet someone that interests you, you date for awhile, and sometimes it works out and sometimes it doesn't.

Obviously, he is NOT the one, and you are NOT meant to be together.......or else he would've felt the same way. You need to recognize this. You can't make someone love you and want to be with you, so just let it go. Stop checking up on his gf and obsessing over him. It may appear slightly stalker-ish.

[Illusional]

yup. he's already left and chosen another person who he wishes to mate with. why don't you pick up at this crossroad and head down another path. living in the past will only bring about more pain and bad memories.. besides, there's a lot of single people lurking around the world today.

raverboy

[Lozenger]

I agree - sorry ;(
But you could always go out with a few friends and flirt with the fitties!
Don't feel unloveable because of your bad relationships. I heard a saying, and I mentioned this in another post:
People are like apples on trees. The good ones are on the top branches and the bad ones are on the lower branches. Some of the bad apples fall to the ground and very few of the good ones fall from the top branches coz the wind blew them off. But people have to go through the bad ones first before reaching the good ones and some lucky people may find a good one first time as it's already on the ground with some of the bad apples. And others only go for the bad ones as they are easier to reach whilst the good ones wait patiently at the top.

So don't feel bad about yourself. If you feel good about yourself and like yourself, others will see it too. Confidence is the key so go out there and have a good time and show everbody that you're fun and worth knowing

Good Luck!


X

[Gigabitch]

When you actually meet The One, you'll be glad this guy went off with Miss Cancer Center. He was all wrong for you. (Case in point- he dumped you for someone else. I'd say that's red flag #1)

You keep having bad relationships because you go after the wrong guys and try to make them into the right ones. You're trying to make it happen. You need to LET it happen.

[Mish]

I seem to end up in a series of bad relationships. The world always makes me feel miserable at times it seems all girls have boyfriends. I don't think that I deserve to be loved. I prefer to go out with whoever wants to date me.

Okay Sarah, I want to stop you right there. I don't think this is about this guy in question at all as much as it is about your point of view (above) and you current state.

Please re-read the above a couple of times. What is it that you are actually saying?

Key words, series of bad relationships, miserable, bad world, don't deserve to be loved. If you ask me, my opinion would be that this is a lot more about your self esteem, than it is about the guy in question. Relationships are not a way to fix your self esteem or to make you feel better, they are something you go in to when you are at peace with your self, when you are confident and happy. If you want my advice, I think you need to find all of these things for yourself before you look for a partner. To achieve that you don't need anybody else, but yourself.

[sari1981]

You aren't compatible it's not bound to last. You "love" him but you aren't right for him.

Leave the girl out of this - quit obsessing over his girl! Learn that you deserve to be loved - there are plenty of guys out there. Work on your self-esteem - so when you encounter Mr. Right, you won't shack up with Mr. Convenient.

[Gigabitch]

You just need to put this behind you and get on with your life. I live in a small town full of ex-boyfriends. I see them all the time. It's no big deal. This guy didn't run over your dog with a truck or something- all he did was break up with you.

You should be glad he had the respect for you to end it with you- some guys would have strung you along and started seeing someone else while they were still with you.

Show him the same amount of respect now by gracefully accepting that this relationship isn't going to happen.