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Thread: Is He Losing Interest?

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    Is He Losing Interest?

    I've noticed that my husband is losing interest in having sex with me after I gave birth. Do men slowly lose interest in having sex with their wife once she gave birth or is it something else?

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    Hard to say. How old is your baby? First one? Are you both exhausted & are you making yourself sexually interesting?

    FWIW, its not usually a loss of sexual interest, its fatigue & a change in schedule. That said, there are some men who get a 'mommy complex' once their wife gives birth, so it depends as I said.
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    It could be related to him viewing you as primarily a mommy (rather than a woman). It is also common for men to be put off a bit if they watched their woman give birth.

    You should schedule a regular babysitter for once a week date nights. Try not to talk baby on these nights.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    Quote Originally Posted by vashti View Post

    You should schedule a regular babysitter for once a week date nights. Try not to talk baby on these nights.
    Rule number one in times like these, DONT HIRE A HOT BABYSITTER. But Vashti has a point here.

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    How long ago did you have the baby? Maybe you put on an extra five or ten pounds in the wrong place. Maybe he feels that you wouldn't be in the mood after the baby. You should be talking to him about all this, not to us.

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    Meh, if he was doing you while you were pregnant, I doubt the weight is the issue (although it may become a probem later).

    How old is the kid, anyway? I was assuming not-very-old, but perhaps I am wrong?
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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    Quote Originally Posted by oceanbreeze View Post
    I've noticed that my husband is losing interest in having sex with me after I gave birth. Do men slowly lose interest in having sex with their wife once she gave birth or is it something else?
    Is there anything different compared to how it was before you gave birth? Any changes in communication patterns / routines?
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    A lot of new dads feel completely left out with a new baby around. That may be part of the problem. Also- did her personally witness a human being coming out of your vagina? This could also be a contributing factor. Changes the perspective, you know?

    However, in my opinion, this is a pheromone issue. You simply smell differently. You're giving off all these mom hormones, not those sex hormones you used to emit. Give it some time. It takes a while to get back to where you want to be after having a baby.

    Sadly, some couples never quite get back there. My ex and I never did. He started relating to me like he did to his mom pretty shortly after I gave birth and never quite stopped. It was like he was embracing the role of "dad" he had in his head and was done being "loverman".

    You may have to resort to new techniques to turn him on. Try to see this as an opportunity rather than an obstacle.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gigabitch View Post

    However, in my opinion, this is a pheromone issue. You simply smell differently. You're giving off all these mom hormones, not those sex hormones you used to emit. Give it some time. It takes a while to get back to where you want to be after having a baby.
    I thought pheromones were scentless? And that people weren't entirely sure if we react to them or not?

    But anyway, I'd say it is because of the experince of having a new life in the house. Perhaps he is more worried about how to be a good parent and may also have noticed that with the new child around, you are kept on your feet alot.

    As others have said, what age is your child? Is this your first one?

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