my gut has been pitted.

[FoxyLaydee]

What a bunch of asswipes! You're better off without him, Misombra. He defended his friend who was very disrespectful in your home. Wtf is wrong with some people?? Geez.

[misombra]

the funny thing is i was trying to talk to the friend in a calm manner. in fact i was in the middle of telling him how much more rude it would be if i didn't say anything at all to him and just ignore him and let it eat me up inside. and that he should know how hurtful his comments were.

but you couldn't hear it because mikey was yelling so loud.

if we survive this, there will be a huge rift in the friends area. i've always gotten along well with his friends. this is his best best friend that's always hanging out. their friendship is stronger i guess. at least i know now, right?

i don't care how much of a friend someone is, if they disrespect me in my house and how i choose to live and the company i keep then sombra will have to regulate.

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zhWGDGHupYA"]YouTube - Warren G, Nate Dogg - Regulate (Uncensored)[/ame]

[misombra]

Honey that's wrong your man did not stand behind you on it. My husband would never allow that kind of shit to happen. It's your house. What was he thinking? It sounds like you need some down time to think this through. Why would he act that way? Men can be such idiots. Do you think he was just making the balls big in front of him? No wonder he's groveling now, he knows he did wrong by you. But I'd surely stand my ground he was in the wrong 100%.


(((((((((hugs)))))))))))

thanks squirrl. thing is he's not groveling. he still believes he was right and i'm just a rotten bitch.

guys always say they want a woman who is straight forward, open, and honest. but rarely do i meet a man who is truly able to stand by such a woman.

[1averagejoe]

Sombra...*hugs*

Screw that asshole. Look at the bright side of this, he proved what kind of person he is to you. You're better off without him. His friend sounds like complete trash, and if your bf is stupid enough not defend you, he's a dumb ass.

I think it's time to move on love. No one should have to put up with that crap. There's also going to be a lot of tension between friends now. Plus, just like cheating, if he can do it once...he'll do it again. I wish you the best, come here to vent. We're here for you and we love ya mis.

[misombra]

Then you should feel glad you can be rid of him and move on w/ your life.

i should. but i don't. i feel miserable.

[misombra]

Damnit! I know you love this guy 'sombra, but he sure pisses me off. Do you have a friend you can lean on for support?

i do thankfully. i have really tried with this person and stood by him through rough shit. why can't he see that?

[misombra]

There's also going to be a lot of tension between friends now.

yeah.

that friend caused it. him and the national inquirer.

his friends: "dude, you don't need a girl who's gonna talk to you like that?" "dude, you can't just talk to company like that." "dude, i never liked the way she treated you in the first place." "dude, i can't believe she had the nerve to say that to me. she asked and i answered her truthfully and she didn't like it..."

i ****ing swear some guys are more nosey and gossipy than women.

[Mish]

no, it wasn't drunken stupidity. it was just plain stupidity.

my stomach still hurts so bad i can hardly breath.

I know that pain

(Hugs)

edit: i just saw a recent message on his computer. he writes stuff down on a word document. it read: "how to get out. don't worry, i have money put away." and his myspace page says "planning my escape."

i think i'm getting dumped for defending my home and him.

Well, like Tone said if he ends up breaking up with you over something silly like that then it probably wouldn't have worked out anyway and it's better sooner rather than later.


If you want my opinion on this, this case has classic hints of something that's been brewing over for sometime. If they had been exchanging messages like the ones you described it means this was something in the making for awhile and I think that the incident where his friend self righteously exploded at you in a very disrespectful manner was something that would probably be triggered by one event or another. I think your friends daughter never even been any type of reason or cause for this outbreak.

The problem is that you love this guy so you probably won't let it go without some type of attempt to salvage your relationship with him. If you really want to have a better chance at salvaging it I can give an advice which will not be easy to implement. Instead of burying Mike which you probably feel like doing right now and are justified in doing by the way, I would advice to dig deeper into the real reasons why this has been brewing and why he had been acting like this. Chances are there had been issues which are yet un addressed and this is an opportunity to bring them to surface and deal with them. Then, once that over and done with, you can get him to ditch his disrespectful friend or at least at the very least get him to apologize.

It will be so much easier though to tell Mike how wrong he is for not defending you and tell him to apologize and if he doesn't then tell him to leave. And if you want to have an easier time and if you truly believe you're done with him, then you can do just this and be done with it.

[misombra]

thanks mish.

my crystal ball is so cloudy right now.

[shh!]

How old is the message about planning his escape? Can you tell? I am wondering if this incident wasn't perhaps a set up..

[misombra]

it was all today. it was set up by his friends. i'm pretty sure it's because i'm a strong woman, and they don't believe in that. they think a woman is supposed to just go along with whatever they say and nod and agree. it's like, a machismo thing.

[Mish]

it was all today. it was set up by his friends. i'm pretty sure it's because i'm a strong woman, and they don't believe in that. they think a woman is supposed to just go along with whatever they say and nod and agree. it's like, a machismo thing.

It could be, but from what I know of Mike from your earlier descriptions I think he is smarter than to think this way and to fall for that. But it could very well be something along the lines of you being a strong woman. Maybe some kind of interaction issue. Some one got upset somewhere by something, some time ago and can't let go. The way most of conflicts seem to escalate. It could be some kind of a persistent interaction issue as well, which once taken care off will no longer cause conflicts.

[IndiReloaded]

Its your home, your rules.

Of course, its Mike's home too, but he was the one breaking guest etiquette, sounds like.

Unless your guest he had an issue with was doing something completely unacceptable (like trashing your house) he had no cause to do what he did. If he dislikes a guest, he should have waited until she left to tell you this. I've had to deal with yucky visitors to our home on occasion. You smile & put a polite face on it. Not make it an issue with another guest & certainly not take their side in an argument over it & alienate one's partner.

Tell Mikey Miss Manners says he needs to get some.

That Facebook thing is just retarded. What are they, 14 years old?

[IndiReloaded]

it was all today. it was set up by his friends. i'm pretty sure it's because i'm a strong woman, and they don't believe in that. they think a woman is supposed to just go along with whatever they say and nod and agree. it's like, a machismo thing.

You are who you are & don't need to apologize for it. Beware anyone trying to put you in a box. They are doing it for their comfort, not yours.

[misombra]

thanks you guys.

i had to get out of bed because i can't ****ing sleep!!!

this pit in my stomach is really bothering me. i need some pepto bismol or something.

anyway yeah, the myspace thing was really immature. i'm having serious doubts about our ability to survive this.