Help! dilemma in an international relationship

[fionangai]

I am a girl from Guangzhou, China. I have submitted my profile to many international dating website, such as perfectmatch, eharmony, Chnlove, chineselovelinks, ect. I received many matches and after a painful selection, I chose one boy on Chnlove as I felt safe communicating on its platform. It seemd that he really was my perfect match. We went on quite well until one day last month. I haven't received his letter for nearly one month. I was almost desperate and finally Chnlove helped me contact him. He caught a car accident and needed a large sum of money to repair his car and could not afford to communicate with me on Chnlove. Then our first inharmony appeared. I am a traditional Chinese girl and in my value, a man is the center of a family and he is the main source of family income. Moreover, he should have some savings for a rainy day. But in his opinion, it is not necessary to put some money aside. What he earns can give him a comfortable life. He always runs out of money.
Therefore, I feel quite insecure with such a man.No security for my future life. What can I do?
Anyone shares similar experience with me? I need your advice.

[Yacker]

If you feel you need a man that brings home the bacon then that's what you must find. Move on and find someone else who can do that plus everything else you need or you can figure out how to get along with his money issues.

[clearskies]

Fionangai: Oh dear... Havent you thought at all it was just a means of him to let you send him money? That is bad and cheap way of begging..
Daily, loads of junk emails, from many countries in the world, arrive at our email accounts even at work and they all tell dramatic stories that happened to them like I have cancer, and this type of fake stories asking for money.

Avoid this guy... You will find a much better one who is not searching for a lady to support him and not to share life with him.

[Aegis]

Don't give him any money.

[Yacker]

wow I totally didn't read her post right. It definitely looks like some sort of scam. How long have you been talking to this guy, like how many emails have you sent him in all? Any other forms of communication. Do not be had by this stuff.

[clearskies]

Let me tell you why I said that, once I have been through an online relationship withsome one who did send me poetry everyday! he started it saying :
- it was his birthday (so i had to send a gift)
- He successfully passed his exam ! (second gift)
- When he tried to send me something, he sent cards; for me and son. They never arrived! I doubted he ever sent them.
- He told me he wd send me another cards which really arrived. One of them had the price tag on it 2.35£!!
- He had the car fixed and it cost him much. I stopped here.

- Again, he kept saying he had a back pain and had to buy a new sporty car but he couldnt afford it!! Later on, I discovered he lied upon me so it was the end of it but i still remember the big needs list he came up with every now and then. So, just get away from such a guy.

[fionangai]

Actually I have a decent job and make enough money. I don't care how much money he has, what concerns me is his attitude towards money and future. Suppose one day, he fell ill and needed a big operation, but he had not enough money, what could he do? Maybe it is the basic difference lying in two different cultures.

To clearskies: Thank you for your kind reminder.I will keep cautious, but it is still hard for me to think that he is a liar. He has spend about one thousand dollars communicating with me as he pays for my reply.

[Yacker]

$1000 to communicate? pays for replys? What are you talking about exactly?