I need some help

[newbeginnings]

I have been seeing this guy for about three years. He suddenly broke up with me. I was paying his bills, buying him and his kids food, and putting gas in his car. He said he nees space to see what else is out there. I have bought him ps3 and laptop over the years and bought clothing for his kids. The sex is great but now he says he will only talk to me if I give him 10 grand. He is manipulating me and I know it but I love him so . I tried to talk to him at his house and he pushed me out his door and left bruises on me. But I still love and want him. I forgot to mention that I am married but it is just like roommates. We are getting a divorce. He just works in Walmart and has nothing. I just love him. My current husband is working on his phd and makes good money. I just don't love him. I need help. I feel so depressed.

[newbeginnings]

I feel so lonely, depressed and dead. I feel like i AM IN A DREAM. iS ALL THIS NORMAL OR AM i GOING CRAZY?

[Bokonon]

Of course I don't know everything about your situation, but it sounds like you experience overpowering loneliness and have clung to this destructive relationship as a lifeline.

First, I recommend that you try to look at your situation as an outsider and ask what sort of advice you would give to another person going through the same thing. Pretend it's not you. What would you say to him/her?

Next, follow your own advice. Likely this means ending this manipulative, destructive relationship no matter how much it hurts.

The step after that might be confronting your husband with your feelings. Perhaps suggest marriage counseling. If your husband is not willing to listen to you and work with you, you may want to consider moving on. It's possible from what you've said that you may have come to depend on his income. If that's the case, figure out whatever you may need to do to become financially independent.

If it is in the end necessary to end your marriage, you'll feel free to seek a healthy relationship rather than being stuck with the person you're seeing now. If your husband is willing to work things through with you, you may find you are not so magnetized to this other man who clearly does not appreciate you for who you are but rather for what you can provide him.

[bluesummer]

I agree with the above post.

You're trying to replace one bad relationship with another one. Why do you feel like you deserve to be treated so horribly?

[Only-virgins]

The sex is great but now he says he will only talk to me if I give him 10 grand. He is manipulating me and I know it but I love him so . I tried to talk to him at his house and he pushed me out his door and left bruises on me. But I still love and want him.

Troll, has to be....come on!

[Mish]

Troll, has to be....come on!

I agree, her post sounds too far fetched

Next thing we'll read is "OMG, I'm stranded in a hotel room tied to a chair and out of money, I haven't eaten for 7 days, please deposit 7K into my bank account"

[newbeginnings]

This is all a true story. I have been used and manipulated by this guy so much that I keep doing what he wants.

[newbeginnings]

I don't know. My previous marriage of ten years was abusive also. He can not even see the kids I had with him. I ended up leaving that one through a women's shelter.

[newbeginnings]

Well the man I care so much for has went to the magistrates office and I now have been summonned for a criminal charge of harrasing calls. After all I have done for him and this is what he does to me. My husband is standing by me and helping me through this. He is also abusive at times too though. That is the reason I left him to begin with. I am so hurt.

[klof54]

love based on sex is not good

[vashti]

I think if this story is true, you need a psychiatric evaluation. There is something seriously wrong with you, and no one on an internet forum will be able to help you.