Sigh...

[Mattur]

So I have been going out with the girl that I love for about 2 months now. Her mom is a alchoholic, drug addict, and suicidal and her dad is gone on business most of the time so she is left to be the mom in the household (taking care of herself and younger brother and sister). Last year she had a boyfriend that that did drugs, got high and dumper her, leaving her heart broken. The only thing I dont like about her is that she has major trust and independance issues resulting from her Ex and her mom. 2 nights ago she went to a party while I was out of town and got hammered out of her mind and then called me and finally told me what had happend, even though it was very evident... This really scares me because we are both underage and shouldnt be drinking, I have seen ALL the negative effects of alchohol/drugs, and because alchoholism is a big problem in her family and life. Im not sure what Im asking, guess Im just venting... Comments or advice would be appreciated though.

[shh!]

My comment would be that you should be very careful with this girl. Although some people are able to recover from having such screwed up families, many aren't able to rise above it. Odds are pretty good that she ends up with at least some of her mother's traits. She is already making bad choices.

[ecojeanne]

well it could be just a growing phase. You have to make mistakes to learn right?

i've had friends that were on drugs and went nuts for a few years in their early 20's and got all that craziness out of their system and now are well adjusted clear thinkers and happy people, they have regrets of course...but thats life. I made a choice to stay away from these people until they became normal again, which took about 6 years....so if this girl is dragging you down just don't associate with her.

[agatha]

Why not try one. Let her change through your help. Be strict with her. You should tell her that doing it because you were concern with her. And that you want her to become good and left that vices she had. If changes occur then continue. But if she gets mad at you for meddling in her life then go. Don't bother her anymore. At least your trying to help others.

[snoz]

This is probably one of the worst things to come across. But As said before you guys are at that stage where you just want to go out and have fun. I did that when I was underage and my family was screwd up but I turned out to be quite right.

The reason was I had someone there to love me but not necessarily restricting me but guiding me. So try and be that guy but just be guarded if it doesn't pan out your way.

and also I know a girl like that and I tried my very best to be there for her but whatever it is she needs to get it out of her system I'm going ahead and let her do it. I'm not trying to crush dreams here but that person who we think are the one can very well not be the one. Time may tell it might not so just go ahead and live your own life but help others along the way.