hi

[NotLikeThat]

Need some help!!!

I loved a guy 2-3 years back.We were in the same college.He had many girls in his life b4 me.I still fell for him hoping that things will work out good between us.He never loved me though.The longest period for which we went out was months
Rest all was about making out,he avoiding me and i begging him to get back to me.I started feeling used.So i decided to let it go.2 years was too long a period to wait.
I then met some one i truely wanted.He loved me a lot.I was very happy with him.My boyfriend.He had to leave to US with in 3 months of we going out.We decided to have a long distance relationship.In the mean time(around 4-5 days of he leaving), when my boy friend was in US my ex came to know abt us and we was suprised.He wanted me to get back to him.I denied. he tried convincing me for around 20 days but he did not succeed.We made out once during this period, like how we used to in earlier days but i did it only to give it back to him.I denied a relationship with him and continued with my present relationship.After this incident i did not do any thing that would hurt my boyfriend.But now my boy friend has come to knw abt that one night i made out with my ex and he wants to end the relationship.I love him a lot and one thing i knw is that he loved me to. But now he has completely misunderstood me and wants to break off .I WANT TO KNW HOW I CAN MAKE THIS RELATIONSHIP WORK?I LOVE HIM A LOT.HOW CAN I CONVINCE HIM?

[krondragon]

Misunderstood? You were dating him and you made out with your ex at the same time. That's pass borderline cheating if that's the definition that you want to o by. I don't understand your reasoning and I think he's doing the right thing. If you do love him that much, do him a favor and let him find someone that will make him happy, not cheat on him.

[agatha]

I think its your fault. Why did you go for a date with him? You should think of the possibilities of what will happened if you agreed for a date before doing it and what if your bf knows about this one. Look happened now? Whose to blame?

[hunk4ever]

Hey guys,

I believe both of us are here so lets combine the threads.

I have started a thread in the broken hearts forum/what kind of a girl she is, what in her mind.....

link is below:

loveforum.net/broken-hearts-forum/25008-what-kind-girl-she-whats-her-mind-doublecrossing.html#post385113

and the above topic is started by the same girl whom I am referring to.

She says that she loves me and hid all this things from me for 10 months.

I cam to know abt this thing from her Ex only.........he said quite a few really bad things abt her too and said that he did not want to miss the chance of sleeping out with his Ex.

I am asking if this girl loved me why would she commit such a horrible thing????

Just imagine, I am working here in the morning an attending classes and she is having a merry time sleping with her Ex....

What sort of a treatment is this ??

[Strato]

Dude, you are a good man. Probably too good and forgiving. But you really shouldnt allow such things to happen in your relationship. You deserve better.

Notlikethat, it is your fault to allow ur ex sleep with you when you are already in a relationship with someone else. You may be a good person but technically, you are two-timing here for your convenience. Giving in to your ex when he Begged you to sleep with him is as good as not respecting hunk4ever and your relationship with him.

If you really want to work this out, you should keep a distance from your ex because your boyfriend here is really forgiving and you shouldnt take advantage of it..

[snoz]

The way I see it some people are a bit more tolerant than others. NotLikeThat if you really want the relationship to work you need to work hard in convincing him and regain his trust it's sad but there's no easier way than that. In your mind you did it to get your ex off you're mind but your bf may think different since he's the one who cherishes the relationship and can't comprehend why you did what you did.

hunk4ever, if you want this to work as well then give her a chance. Wipe it from your memory and pretend it never happened, don't hold a grudge, don't even try to think about it and just enjoy spending time with her. If you really can't help but think about it then perhaps the relationship can't be repaired. She said she loves you and if she's genuinely sorry then why not? We all make stupid mistakes we all deserve a chance.

Funny though, if you two are the couple why aren't you listening to each other or talking to each other instead of posting on here.

[hunk4ever]

She says that she made out with he Ex only to give it back to him....Am I puppet to her that I would accept the fact of her sleeping with her Ex??......with all the time and fond memories that I had spent with her before leaving the country....Is this how she compliments me?

Did she just use me to take revenge by sleeping?

Where is the faith, love, trust and all those promises gone.....Was'nt my relationship exclusive?

We tried to speak with each other....I get angry

[hunk4ever]

It was not like she was drunk or intoxicated when she slept with him.......what was in her mind when she did it....doesn't she care abt my feelings....What kind of a love is this??

I apologize to ask so may questions....but I am confused and I'm getting that weird feeling in my mind of cheating and insecurity....

[wilsongan]

Hello Notlikethat,

How u doing? Hope all's well. Guess what, I got to be honest. I am a guy. Yes, honesty number 1. Honesty number two is. You screwed up! Live with that.

You cannot convince him. You're not selling anything to him. And even if you could today, the scar might return in the future. Are you willing to pay for this?

The only only way to convince him, that you know you're wrong, and you really really love him. Send him a letter, call him later.

Tell him, I'll wait for you for as long as it takes for you to believe me that I love you THAT much and what I did, was the stupidest thing. I was weak!

After that, MEAN WHAT YOU SAY!

Start waiting, and let him think. Now this is a gamble. He might just not care at all. But he might.

Here's the catch. I asked, if you're willing to pay the price. This is the price. Losing him entirely with no chance of getting back forever. That's the price. What's the odd? You get him back forever, and you get to stitch up that BIG mistake you did! Cause your wait and willingness to get hurt, represents your sincerity. Now don't hope he come back.

Just hope you can take the pain. If he comes back, its your bonus. Get yourself a lottery ticket cause you just struck one!
And be happy for the rest of your life.

If not, remember never to do things like that every in your life again!

Regards,

Wilsongan

[wilsongan]

By the way, do you know your GUY is at the same time posting for advice in this same forum? (Winkz)

[hunk4ever]

We have started to talk on the phone these days.

But I cant talk to her the way I used to earlier. Feel like the the innocence has lost in our talks.

She says "I love you" quite some times but sometimes i just feel like she does not mean it and just behaving like old times when she had fooled me.

I dont feel like saying "I love you" to her.

The only one time that I told her I love you was a couple of days back when I slipped from the staircase and injured my hand.

I showed the wound to her on the webcam and wanted her to be close to me at that time.

Dont know how will I heal from these emotional wounds.....