heart broken here, this thread isn't boring (i think)

[youngrasta]

I guess i'll start off, i'm a young man. I met a girl in china and i married her. Yeah, it sounds like what it is, what was he thinking? I was a boy and did something big. Anyways, i was so lucky to have her as long as I have. She's amazing, I could marry her again and live with her for the rest of my life.

I use to be a loner, and I liked it. I chose my friends carefully and I had a cat, and it was good. I wanted to find paradise and live the right way, and I could do it alone if i had to. You know, girls who want to live that way are not common; I haven't seen any. Well this chinese girl has been the thing that changed me into a man and opened my eyes to something I needed to know. true love.

She dumped me one month ago or more. I was with her for 3yrs, more or less, and sheesh I feel like we went places most people don't always find. I found true love. We both understand we had something special, which is like nothing we've had before. She near immediated found a decent replacement. He's a chinese boy who's opposite of me. I want to be normal like him so badly, but I chose my path and paid the price. I'm a tall white boy with dreadlocks (clean, good ones). Just if an angel could have enlightened me before it came time to pay up. I would have cut off my dreads, thrown away my interests, treated her better, and kept her heart full... it would have been happy, i mean fun.

But I had to pay for my choices and I couldn't take it back, it was too late.

I worked hard for over a year job to job, yet I didn't take her on dates, I didn't have nearly enough fun with her. I learned how to work. I took a job in the ghetto. Now i'm in the ghetto with nothing important around me. So put me out of my misery, wait I can't say and feel that can I? This world is making me so tired, I know what I've got to do. I need another true love, or I need her back. I'm a rasta,.. and I can't live without a woman, this sucks. maybe someday my spiritual side will bloom and i'll have a closer relationship with god.. complete love. I don't want to fall into a ghost story when I do hah. anyways nice to meet you all.

love is such a dangerous game, even if you wish not to participate in the festivities. it hurts as much as I love it. I never knew love before this girl. I never reached so deep in it's fulfulling stream. Will it ever be the same? I think not, but sheesh, it hurts so.. and girls!!?

Boy do I love girls, but I believe in one love. She might come back to me, she understands how I feel, but she doesn't feel that romantic kind of love anymore for me. I treaded carefully, I tried to win her back, but she was so tired as well. She found a new stream in the world of love which fills her hearts content, for now, and i am so happy for her, if I wasn't so hurt. She stomped on my heart and now I gotta spend the next few years looking for more true love. fate is so cruel, and free will has a limitless potential, but shouldn't it be alittle easier? who made this game so hard?

But I'm good, I'm positive even in the face of this problem. Some help would be nice though, because I don't feel the greatest. I wonder what the easiest way to maybe get lucky and find true love is, 'cause next time i find it, it will be forever.

Oh and if anyone ever invents a sleep machine I need an off switch some days, but if it was expensive it wouldn't be much help. haha, man I love this world, always thought I didn't but it's special, even if it's double edged. Well, I can't wait for her to call me again, she's my new friend.. hope it ends well, i need to forget about the non-friend part of her.

[ecojeanne]

i'm sorry for your pain. but you will eventually get over her. life is full of disappointments and someday if you keep yourself open you will meet another girl. good luck

[rudey]

I'm sorry too. Honestly, right now the best remedy is to get your butt out of the house and start meeting new people. I know you are a bit of a "loner" as you stated, but sitting around dwelling on the situation is not going to make it any easier to deal with. Therefore start dating other girls. Nothing serious, just do it to get your mind off your ex and to get the wind back in your sails.

[snoz]

I worked hard for over a year job to job, yet I didn't take her on dates, I didn't have nearly enough fun with her. I learned how to work. I took a job in the ghetto. Now i'm in the ghetto with nothing important around me. So put me out of my misery, wait I can't say and feel that can I? This world is making me so tired, I know what I've got to do.

In the end you feel so bad because of your choices. At times I didn't know if going out and having fun with my ex was more important or getting my life back on track. You regret one thing or another and I think you made the right choice.

I can only say hang in there as I made the same choices you have and open your eyes. Even when you think there's nothing around you you'd be surprised just how much there is.