feminists: anti-traditional dating?

[Off2College]

If you are a feminist, and want to be on equal footing with the dude, would you still accept him paying for your dinner or buying you tickets to a show?

[ecojeanne]

well i feel the problem has nothing to do with feminism, i let my family guy members and their friends pay for me all the time - it's expected coz i'm a girl. i still adore chivalry

however when dating i think men can use it as a power of control. men feel entitled then if they have spent money. i refuse to accept anything without condition that i give back the equivalent or it's 50/50. it has nothing to do with wanting to feel equal in the world it has to do with control of the situation and them. no excuses to expect any unnecessary gratitude and therefore control.

[The Godfather]

dating is like prostitution for guys, only you don't always get what you paid for... Just kidding

[DoesntMatter]

Feminism is a funny joke. Don't take it seriously O2C

[Gribble]

The women who call themselves feminists today aren't really feminists. They're just man-haters. Screw equality. I enjoy paying for the date. And to be perfectly honest, I think it's an even trade. Hell, if anything she's the one getting the short end of the stick.

I lay down a small stack of cash to cover dining and entertainment. She graces me with the mesmerizing beauty and poise only a woman (or a very suspect male) can achieve. Women shave parts I'd be afraid to come near with a razor. They buy pricey clothes to wear on dates. They spend hours fixing up their hair, plucking lashes, applying all sorts of expensive creams and stuff. All to take my breath away.

[vaneigem]

I think everyone I've dated has refused to allow me to pay, and although I always offer to pay out of politeness a girl who allowed me to would not be seeing me for a second date unless she really impressed me in other ways; I've never found myself attracted to that sort of subservient behaviour at all, even a lot of old-style flirting (the feigned-weakness flirting) puts me right off. I like a girl who has qualities and strengths that I respect and look up to.

[lesa]

I heard that if a girl insists paying and does end up paying the first date that it's not a good sign for a relationship coming.

[vashti]

The word "feminist" has unfortunately been made a pejorative, and many young people don't have a clue as to what the word really means. The ill-informed think it is synonymous with male-hating, as Gribble pointed out.

If you ask someone out on a date, whether or not they call themselves a feminist, it is appropriate for you to pay. If they get offended because you want to treat, they are idiots. (I really can't see that happening, though... most people would just reciprocate the kindness.)

[carl1222]

I think Gribble sums it up well from the male point of view ...

And most women who are trying to make it a feminist argument are trying to justify why they show up at the door in a ratty flannel shirt and a unibrow! We both (men and women) need to make an effort!

Carl.