done with it all

[whatusedtobe]

ok i want to know waht you guys think

I have been dating my boyfriend for almost 3years I loved him alot and i still do but just not the same as i did... We started dating while we were still in highschool and it was wierd because he got out of a relationship to be with me after we had accidently kissed... anyways we fight alot and always did we fought before we even started dating (i used to say it was just how we were) but my biggest problem with him is he wont do anything for himself... i pay his bills i cook i come home from work and i get bitched at for our room being a mess... we live with his dad because his dad is sick so we are taking care of him but i think that even if his dad wasnt sick we would still be living here because he wont get a job to help out with the rent or bills anywhere.. We moved to florida together and moved back to pensylvania and i payed for both trips he has had one construction job for 2 weeks then he quit because it was too hard... i just dont get it.. then when i told him i was tired of being taken advantage of he gets all defensive like its my fault because i dotn have my license and he has to drive me to work... i work 2 blocks away I CAN WALK.... i know i need to get my shit together and start driving but really that shouldnt be an excuse should it???

i told him last night i thought it was best if we just broke up and now its hard because i dont want to screw stuff up with his family because i love them... i think they will understand where i am coming from but i am still worried about hurting them.... also he has nothing if i leave... not even a bed... what do you think ??

[ButterflyDreamz]

Well, if you think he's taking advantage of you...there's really no point in staying with him. This is a detrimental relationship. Say goodbye to him...can't he stay with his dad anyhow? He's not your problem anymore if you break up with him.
If you can find it somewhere in your heart, then help him find some place to go..but he can't rely on you for everything. He's an adult in his own right and should know how to act like one.
It won't necessarily ruin your relationship with his family, but that depends on what they hear/believe from their son. I'm sure they'll be understanding all things considered tho. You're not going to hurt his family...you're just...annoying their son because he can't use you anymore.
Go find someone else with whom you can have a mutually positive relationship. Right now you're just giving and he's just taking. You need to find someone you can have a balanced relationship with!
Good luck!

[Mish]

i am still worried about hurting them.... also he has nothing if i leave... not even a bed... what do you think ??

Well, if you are worried about hurting them that changes everything, perhaps you can leave him the bed

You are going to hurt him either by leaving or by staying for now and leaving later, so might as well just be out with it.

[mike_love]

Come on why are you still living with him? I think you should dump his ass because he'll ruin your life, this is no relationship to have and i believe his familly will understand if they don't...keep your head up and continue with your life because right now you don't have one. And that with the driver's license it's just a lame excuse and shows what kind of man he is. You'll find somebody better who deserves you don't worry about that. I wish you the best of luck!!!!

[sine24]

this is not just a relationship lesson he needs to learn, but a LIFE lesson. he needs to understand that relying on others all the time isn't gonna get him anywhere. if you stay with him, you'll only be sending him the 'it's okay' message, and soon enough you'll end up married to a slob.