One-sided love affair. What should I do??

[Mr_Magic]

I fell passionately in love with one of my group mates at the university. We've studied together for 2 years, but the feeling came just recently. I tried to make a date for 3 times, but each time she postponed it, never saying no to me. She said she was working, so she couldn't come. We talk a lot, exchange messages and she's friendly to me. Recently she told me that she's depressed and is "searching for herself". She said that it's not only about the classes and studying. And she looks really upset when I see her, I try to support her, to find out what's wrong with her, but she won't tell. And she told me one day that she missed the classes because she was busy making arrangements about a 'costume' that was sewn for her. I don't know what costume she was talking about, she didn't tell me that either. Strange, it must have been for some special purpose, because otherwise she would have bought it in a store. What should I do, what does it all mean? Don't you think she might be looking for a sponsor, for a rich guy to give her money? This explains why she's in need for money now as she's working, that explains why she's upset (while the previous sponsor left her) and partly explains why she needs thenew 'costume'. What do u think? Or am I just going nuts? Plz help me, I love her so much, that I even my dreams at night are about her.

[hansjagat]

hi buddy....

Here is a small piece of advice for you. Its a one sided love so first of all you have to be very patient. Try to find that what is going in her mind and don't indulge much with her until you come to know in what way she takes you, else later you only will have to repent. Most importantly of all please take take care of your health.

[doppelgaenger]

Well frankly, it doesn't sound like she's interested, so you might as well give up on her.

[Mr_Magic]

I can't give her up. I'm too depressed, I only feel well when I talk to her or see her at least. I blame myself for being so stupid and to have wasted 2 years without realizing that she is the girl I was looking for all these years. By the way she's my first experience, as I haven't loved anyone that strongly. I'm 19 and haven't had a girlfriend, can u believe that. So what do u suggest I do? Should I quit messaging her and only answer the questions she asks? How do I understand what's on her mind?

[Mish]

I can't give her up. I'm too depressed, I only feel well when I talk to her or see her at least.

That's your problem, not hers. You don't need anyone to feel happy, ultimately you need to find happiness for yourself and by yourself and then when you are happy, revisit the dating the scene.

She canceled on you 3 times, to me this is a polite way of saying "no". Maybe she just sees you as a friend and she's not interested in anything more.

[Mr_Magic]

So what do u suggest I do? Give up the idea of making her mine and just live with this fact?