Will you consider someone who have incurable but treatable std?

[miserablechap]

Recently i know a lady. Overall she is my kind of ideal partner. However, she did mentioned to me that she has incurable but treatable sexually transmitted disease. Under such circumstance, will you still want to consider such lady?Please advise

[1averagejoe]

Incurable but treatable...what STD is this? There's treatment for AIDS but that doesn't mean you're going to live.

I don't know if you know...but having sex with someone that has an STD usually means there's a very good chance you'll get it. Even with a condom.

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

Thats not a risk I am willing to take. She should find a partner that share's the same std as her, or a std in general, and be with them instead of risk giving it to someone else.

Is that a risk anyone would truly want to take? I sure wouldnt.

[IndiReloaded]

It would depend on the disease, and how she got it.

[carl1222]

Are you talking about HSV type 2 (genital herpes)? If so, then I might consider a sexual relationship with a very special girl as long as she was being treated and we took all precautions to minimize the risk of transmission.

Carl.

[lesa]

It could possibly be hpv but I doubt she would mention that in "incurable but treatable std".

Next we have HSV and that is the most common one someone would mention as "incurable but treatable std".

Also we have HIV and HCV or even HBV and those three are very serious (aka life-threatening).

Unless I am in a serious relationship...I don't know. I don't know what circumstances would have me consider a relationship with someone with a sti. What is their quality of life and are they really ready for a relationship. Also their sex life will not be great depending on the viral disease.

[miserablechap]

The std that she mentioned is actually HSV(Genital Herpes)

[Charlie Boy II]

If it was a special girl with HSV I would probably give it a go. If you wear condoms and she takes medication I believe the risk of transmission is minimal - even over years of sex.

But don't take my word for it, you should read up on the virus and the associated risks for yourself and then make an educated decision.

It's a good sign of character that she's come out and told you though.

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

Im sorry, call me cold, but I would not do it. Its too much of a risk. We're always taught to protect ourselves from std's and any infections and im gonna turn around and date someone KNOWING they have one? If I know it is a possibility things will get physical then why bother? I dont think I can love someone enough to want to be with them with an std. I dont have one, so why should I put myself in the fire? To show I love them? Nah, I'll be the heartless bitch and turn them down. My health is far more important.

[Charlie Boy II]

^^^ well then Nisha if you're that concerned you should regulate your sexual behaviours more. In the US 1 in 4 people has HSV. So there's a very real chance you've ALREADY slept with someone with HSV. Most people who have it don't know it.

Both Kristin and I got blood tests for HSV because of how common it is (it's about 1 in 6 here though, a bit lower than the US). It was highly nerve racking actually, but good news for both of us.

Edit: And I'm talking about HSV2 here, the kind that usually causes genital infection and is the more aggressive.

HSV1 is even more common - about 50% have it. That's the kind that causes cold sores except most people that have the virus don't get sores.

[carl1222]

The std that she mentioned is actually HSV(Genital Herpes)

What Charlie said is right from what I read. You might want to ask your doctor though ... we are all unqualified to give medical advice.

Lesa ... most guys don't give much thought to HPV because we can't get cancer of the cervix.

Carl.

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

I understand that, and I think its scary, but if I got the chance to actually KNOW you have it, Im not gonna go there with you. Arent there sites for people with sti's and stuff for dating? Wasnt that mentioned in a previous thread?

[lesa]

CB beat me to it. Ladie unless your sexual partners have been tested you probably already had sex with a person with hpv or hsv. It's very good that this lady has told her future partner about it. Of course it doesn't make it easier to decide. If you know the relationship will be very serious then maybe I would consider. If I know there is no potential then I probably would not.

What Charlie said is right from what I read. You might want to ask your doctor though ... we are all unqualified to give medical advice.

Lesa ... most guys don't give much thought to HPV because we can't get cancer of the cervix.

Carl.

I do not mean to be rude but thoughts like that are the reasons for many sti in the first place--people thinking they can't get stuff.

Don't allow the commericals to be your only education.

You think hpv "thinks" and says, "hey I'm only going to possibly attack the woman's cervix to give her cancer but since her male partner doesn't have one, the man is fine"? A man can get cancer...penile cancer (how tramatic) ..anal cancer..genital warts (what do you think warts are?) Warts are from the human papilloma virus family. Do you get warts?

Don't get me started on hpv vaccines.

[lesa]

I understand that, and I think its scary, but if I got the chance to actually KNOW you have it, Im not gonna go there with you. Arent there sites for people with sti's and stuff for dating? Wasnt that mentioned in a previous thread?

Wouldn't you rather know before than have sex with someone that may have something you can get but is not telling you?

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

So because I know before hand I should willingly have sex with them? Knowing makes it easier for me to decide that I wont do it. I know that to prevent it with someone who doesnt tell me I should require them get tested, but my only thing Im trying to get across in this thread is if I know you got it, Im not doing it.