Hi everyone! I'm a newbie here. I don't even know why i'm doing this I just felt I needed an avenue to vent my weariness over something which I couldn't have. I wrote something last oct 2008 and I want you guys to tell me what i've gone through (or whatever it is i was talking about). I just wanted to know if I was able to articulate mu tumultuous feelings that time. Thanks -

Expression

He overwhelms me…
I saw the man, not what he represents
As he stood there ready to walk
down the aisle to receive his new assignment
My world stopped, my heart pounded
With Lump in my throat, I almost stammered
to ask who the man was…

Then on, my life changed
Though a bit disturbed, inspiration rose
It helped that love ones kept me focused
His service moved me
Can’t fathom why a man this gorgeous
Married Him, whom I love and feared

Things changed as events came
I asked Him why I had to be alone
Was I to be tested? I prayed not
Seeing him again and again didn’t help
As I watch him fulfill his vows,
the emotions rose and grew deeper
While there was joy, there was pain,
Much, much pain
Knowing that he can never, ever be mine.

I pray then, as I pray now
That the Lord grant me the grace to fight
Whatever it is in my heart
For I fear being damned forever
That He may just bless me
a chaste relationship with him, His man.

By the way, i'm not into poetry, neither am I a major in english literature or anything related to writing, i'm an engineer. I've said my purpose earlier on. Help please