I feel like I'm in the Bachelor show...

[jaystone77]

I just moved out on my own and have been dating different girls to 'play the field'. However, most haven't gotten past the 1st date. But now I find myself regularly dating 2 girls abd I've been sleeping with one of them. I haven't slept with the other b/c I think it would be wrong to sleep with more than one person at once, but I find myself developing some really strong feelings for her. The one I've been sleeping with I think is wanting to be serious. I like her too obviously, I know I can only have one serious GF.... I'm sure this happens to alot of people as they are out dating different people, but this hasn't happened to me before. I have to break it off with one of them sooner or later but how do I know when to do it? I feel torn...

[vashti]

I think you should break things off when it is clear they are looking for something other than what you are offering. Clearly, that time has come for you already, since you know the girl you are sleeping with wants to be serious with you, and you don't reciprocate the interest.

[jaystone77]

I think you should break things off when it is clear they are looking for something other than what you are offering. Clearly, that time has come for you already, since you know the girl you are sleeping with wants to be serious with you, and you don't reciprocate the interest.

Well, she's never said that she wants to be serious yet but I can tell b/c she's started to talk about things in longer term than just a few days. but thanks for your reply, that really helps.

[vashti]

I also want to say that I think you should be very clear about the nature of a relationship when you start having sex with a girl. If having sex does not imply exclusivity to you, then I think it would be wise to be up front about that. A lot (most) girls would start to assume a more meaningful relationship if you sleep with them more than once. Things could get ugly.

[jaystone77]

Yes I am aware of that, and I slept with her b/c I like her. This is going to get ugly, I don't want to hurt anybody. But someone must get hurt at this point, the other girl clearly is smitten with me too. I feel like a jerk at this point because I really would be happy being in a relationship with either one. I know I can't do that deep down, I also worry about making the wrong decision. You know, if I pick the one that will end up dumping me and lost the one that would otherwise be a great g/f. thats really selfish of me I know..

and on slight note.. I bet there are guys out there that would love to be in my situation lol. I know I always wanted to be in this situation but now that i'm in it, I realize that there are feelings involved and it really sucks!

[vashti]

Well, it's going to suck for a while, but you will probably remember these days fondly when you are an old geezer.

[Cbrider]

No, I never want to be or ever will be that position because I would never whore myself out to allow that to happen.

Break it off and stop being a pussy, you're choosing to hurt one of them. This isn't some innocent situation.

[xluckythangx]

Seriously, break it off with the one you don't want to be with. Don't play it out any longer, because your going to end up hurting them even more. And I would think a little harder next time you just want to play the field. Im pretty sure if a girl was to play the field, we'd be called something along the lines of a tramp? slut? whore? but its okay for guys to do it? And like the other poster said and was completely right, most girls think the relationship is going somewhere if it wasn't just a one night stand... so your going to end up hurting her even more if you keep sleeping with her just to tell her, that you decided that you don't want the relationship to go any farther than what you have because there's this other girl, that you have been seeing on the side. wow that sounds bad, i think you have gotten yourself into quite a mess!!
good luck recovering from this one... and good luck making sure the other girl doesn't find out that you were playing her to, it happens, and then you'll be royally screwed by two girls.