Bi-Polar

[Rollerderby]

Has anyone ever dated anyone with Bi-Polar disorder? Or is close to someone and sees their love-lives?

I really care about my ex-boyfriend, but it's a lot of medication and he's the ex because of how horrible it went the first time. He did a 180 once we started dating. It makes me scared to go back.

Thing is, he has come back into my life again. (And he did let me bitch him out for a few hours when I was wasted, he sober, taking all the shit I hurled at him telling me I was right.) I know he still cares, I still care, and he is the person I fell for. We both agree that the past is just that.

But he is realistic and knows his disease is unpredictable.
There is a lot more to this than I can really tell in an easy fit caption. Does anyone really know anything about dating someone with this disease?

[Lite]

People who are bi-polar will relapse. They will get worse, they will make your life a living hell. Then they will get better until the cycle repeats itself.

Do yourself a favor, get a copy of Wishful Drinking by Carrie Fisher if you want a good idea of what you could be dealing with in an ongoing basis when dating a bipolar person.

Yes folks, Princess Leia is a bi-polar sex/drug/alcohol addict with parental issues who had a gay friend die in bed next to her not too long ago. If you can see her perform the book on stage, it's even better.

[Mish]

I was with someone with undiagnosed BPD (I assumed because all the symptoms fit). It can be similar to Bipolar only a lot worse. I could only handle three months and I am never coming back to that hell.

[mixedconfused]

also keep in mind that bi-polar disorder is hereditary and if you last long enough it could be a problem you may have to encounter in your children

[Rollerderby]

I was with someone with undiagnosed BPD (I assumed because all the symptoms fit). It can be similar to Bipolar only a lot worse. I could only handle three months and I am never coming back to that hell.

Yeah, BPD is not the same, borderlines are manipulative and a little more ****ed (I knew a girl in college... yeesh) but bi-polar is like having a crack in the brain. Overly emotional and analytical, usually very smart. It's the range of Mania to Depression that signifys is someone has it or not.

I wouldn't date something with BPD either.

[Rollerderby]

also keep in mind that bi-polar disorder is hereditary and if you last long enough it could be a problem you may have to encounter in your children

Yes, this is true, we talked about this the first time we dated. We want different things as far as family goes. He started talking about marriage way too early in our relationship, which for me made it too intense to want to continue. It wasn't that I didn't feel the same way, it's just that I hated arguing about life that was at least five years down the road and couldn't enjoy the moment.

Sigh, it seems like it will never be even remotely stress free.... but I love him? It was the first relationship I had that made me realize that love may not always be enough.

[Gigabitch]

I could love a bipolar man, commit to him and marry him. What I could never do is have a child with him. If that's a dealbreaker for him, then end it now.

[Rollerderby]

I could love a bipolar man, commit to him and marry him. What I could never do is have a child with him. If that's a dealbreaker for him, then end it now.

No, he wants to adopt. It's just that I do want to carry a child of my own. Silly biological urges...

[steelsword]

You answered your own question there Rollerderby. If you want to have your own child (non-adopted) and he does not, then why waste anymore time on him? You deserve to find someone who wants the same things as you and doesn't have this nagging health issue looming as well.
My brother is/was bi-polar and has had plenty of girlfriends/dates, but if I were a woman, I sure as hell wouldn't date him. He can be a real *** sometimes.

[Gigabitch]

It's not all about the gene pool, Rollerderby. It's about the environment. A bipolar person's home is no place for a child, adopted or not. He should opt out of parenthood.

[Rollerderby]

Thanks, guys. To re-iterate, we aren't dating right now. We were and it ended because he was not doing well at the time and was kind of an ass. I steered clear of him for three years. And it has been hard for me while dealing with this because it's like my head is telling me what everyone here is, and my heart is telling me something else.

It's like we are perfect for each other, except he's bi-polar... and that's a big except. He's good for me on some levels and I for him, but I am very hesitant to start up with him again because it's basically like asking for a life filled with sorrow. That doesn't change how I feel.

I feel like if anything, we'd have one of those unconventional relationships, where we're never fully together but always drift back into each others life in a companionship-style.

I don't want to get hung up on what I think I want. And I'm still young and there's still time. It's just that since the subject was broached a while ago, and now it's kind of coming back around, it got me thinking again.

[Mish]

I wouldn't recommend being with someone with a major disorder. I know it's harsh, but relationships are hard enough as they are they don't need further complications. Plus, if he's an ex, it didn't work out before, it won't work out in the future.

Yeh, these are all words. We think with our heads first, the feelings take longer to catch up to them, but they do in the end.

[Illusional]

it's not worth all the drama.. from what i have seen... it has ripped apart a girl's life who dated a bipolar guy. he couldn't understand the fact that she didn't want to have a relationship with him, and he continued to bother her and all of her future bf's.

raverboy

[vashti]

He has a serious mental disorder. It will not get better. I really don't know how anyone could seriously consider this. Don't you have a self-preservation gene?

[Rollerderby]

Yeh, these are all words. We think with our heads first, the feelings take longer to catch up to them, but they do in the end.

Sigh, I'd like to still believe what I did as a kid. That love conquers all :-/