Could he really be interested?

[Papillon Girl]

I am sure this is going to sound stupid when I ask this but I do doubt myself at times and want to be as sure as I can before I do anything else. I am not sure whether this man likes me or not and would appreciate your thoughts.

I have known him through work for a year or so now but only get to see him every couple of months or so. A few weeks ago, we ended up sitting next to each other at a long lunch so it was the first time he and I could talk just to each other. We got on well and there was some very flirty chat. However at the end of the afternoon we went our separate ways.

I saw him again yesterday for the first time since then. He was friendly and seemed pleased to see me and even before we all went for lunch there was some mild flirty chat from him. We all went for lunch and we ended up sitting next to each other again. The conversation was all very good humoured and did include other people sitting around us but he and I talked to each other more so than anybody else. Our legs were lightly touching under the table and our hands did keep brushing against each other. He also offered me some of his meal to taste (and vice versa) and shared a pudding. After the meal, he then moved his chair with the excuse that he could talk to everybody but he ended up directly facing me and resting his foot on the base of my chair.

Now I know the conversation was flirty and there were hints at what could happen next time but I am wondering whether that is just "idle talk" or whether he may actually be interested. Hence am I reading too much into his body language?

[trisha]

i think he's interested in you...did he ask for your number?

[Papillon Girl]

did he ask for your number?

No he didn't but he knows my office number plus it would have been difficult for him to ask for my personal number and make a note of it without work colleagues noticing (am I making excuses for him?).

[Papillon Girl]

Anybody else got any views on this? I like him but don't want to mess up by saying or doing something I shouldn't, especially because of work.

[lil machina]

hmm.. i don't think u're overly reading the body language since if a guy closes the gap between u two, he is DEFINITELY into u in a way.. but, are u sure the talk is flirty? maybe to u it is, but who knows, maybe it's normal talk for the guy.. but i think u should go a step ahead.. and probably ask him out for a hang out after work or something.. good luck

[Papillon Girl]

Oh the conversation is definitely flirty - lots of innuendos etc on both sides but I want to be sure that this is not just chat and there is something more to it. I do need to speak to him about work during the week but it so hard over the phone when you cannot pick up on all the signals. He also lives about 4 hours or so from me so it is not easy to just meet up.

However the next time I will see him is next month and it will be an overnight hotel stay with work so there would be more time together then (though again other colleagues will be there). He did make a point of asking me how many nights I was staying.

[alovehangoverr]

He sounds like he may just enjoy being able to flirt with you. I think if he was interested he would have made some sort of move, slipped you his phone number, etc so that it wouldn't be another month between meetings.

I've got to ask though-- where do you see this going? He's a co-worker and he's 4 hours away. Doesn't sound like a great idea.

[Papillon Girl]

He sounds like he may just enjoy being able to flirt with you.

To be honest, this is my concern because whilst the flirting has been strong, it had not been taken further yet. So I am trying to figure out whether to try and take things to the next stage. He has hinted at that but I am not sure whether the actions will back up the words.

I've got to ask though-- where do you see this going? He's a co-worker and he's 4 hours away. Doesn't sound like a great idea.

I am not after some big serious relationship at the moment so more than happy for something whereby we see each other when we can.

[lil machina]

well.. why don't you make the first move then? i mean.. he has hinted right?
i worry if you keep thinking about this it might affect your work performance or something.. it's better to clear the doubts no?

whatever it is good luck!!!

[Papillon Girl]

This is not affecting my work and I will make sure this remains so.

I guess I will have to make a move - tricky as he is senior to me so I do think I need to wait until I next see him and can judge his reactions.

[Papillon Girl]

Having a frustrating couple of days with this man I like. Because of our work I don't actually see him on a day to basis or even have a work need to speak to him - until this week. So I have been trying to get in touch with him for a couple of days now and with no luck. I know he is out and about so his mobile is the only option but I also know that the area he is in can have really bad reception at times. So there I am phoning him with him not getting the call and I end up looking like a stalker (he does not have his voicemail on either so I can't just leave a message!).

I have sent him a couple of texts asking him to call - one was on Tuesday and he did call back within half an hour but of course I was not at my desk - typical. In message he left he did say that the phone reception was really bad. The other was late yesterday afternoon and I had to leave not long after that. I have said on my texts what the work query is so he knows it is not personal so hopefully he is not feeling pressured but this is not how I wanted things to work out.

Any advice on how to handle things when I do speak to him? I am thinking of just trying to talk about the work and only take it further if he seems OK. I don't want him to feel as if I am coming on too strong. Help!