I Keep Feeling Hatred Towards My Ex.. Normal?

[Raze]

So, here's my breakup story. My ex and I were together for 5 months. I really liked her and really liked spending time with her. I thought that was reciprocated. But guess what? As the relationship progressed my instincts sensed something was up and kept asking if everything was okay. I knew something was up when she started to want everything between us to be secret especially when we stopped kissing in public. That made me very upset. So, I found out that another guy was flirting with her. This is the sad part. We're both from Pennsylvania right. This dude is from Oklahoma. =O It gets better. So, she keeps telling me this guy is flirting with her and I was like ummmmmm okay... Everyone was saying how she stopped treating me good and stuff and I just ignored it. BAD BAD BAD! He keeps texting and stuff and I keep asking her about because it's upsetting me. All of a sudden, I start prying information out of her and I find out she is in love with him. WHAT THE ****? This dude is from Oklahoma. And I keep telling her that and suddenly I say. You know what, go **** yourself. I'm over this ****! So, I ended it. Then, I try to sever contact with her and she finds ways to contact me. Oh, the horror because I still kinda had feelings and I kept getting hurt so I finally severed all contact with her and now she has a different boyfriend at the same college I go to. I dont know what happened to Oklahoma dude. = / But ugh. Everytime I see her, I feel like I want to kill her. I have taking actions to start dating again and meet other women, but I still loathe her. Is this normal or am I crazy?

[pinkscorpion]

Oh, it's totally normal. Or...if it's not normal, than neither am I, haha.

I also dated someone who was positively horrible to me and "fell in love" with someone else while he and I were together. I had soooo much anger for so long about everything. I still have a lot of of anger, in some ways.

Every time I see him, my first instinct is still to rip his balls off, rip his eyeballs out, and put the balls where the eyeballs go and vice versa. The crazy thing is, I'm 1000 times less angry at him than I used to be.

Something that helped me a little was seeing that eventually he was miserable. He ended up flunking out of school, the girl moved, and now he's doing....who cares? He's doing nothing productive, that's for sure.

You just watch. This girl will reap what she has sown. The best karma always takes time.

Just try to be the best person you can be.
That's another thing that helped me a bit. I used what happened with him as motivation to be a person that no one else would ever want to leave. I started working as hard as I could in school, I started taking better care of my self, and I've been working on being more confident and having more self-respect. Every time I do something awesome, in my head, I think "**** you, you stupid bastard. Suck on THAT."

It helps!
Good luck. <3 I'm in your shoes to a certain extent and I know it sucks.

[Indignant]

crazy...same is I...i want to kill all of my exes.

[Yggdrasil]

In my opinion you should be greatfull and happy.

If I would be in your situation, I would walk up to her, thank her for showing her true colors and calmly tell her how greatfull I am that she showed me that she's not great couples material. In addition I would tell her that I am extremely thankfull that it's over between her and me and that I am so happy I wont have to deal with the consequenses of the unhealthy and toxic relation I would have had with her. Then I'd hug her, thank her one more time and with a big smile on my face say: "sayonara" and walk away from her, calmly and with great dignity, my head up high, while she's standing there her jaw hitting the floor.

Now you may think that's silly, but in all honesty, that's the biggest slap in the face you can give her (and it'll make you feel good to, because you took the power back she had over you).

Don't believe me? Try it.

[alex12345]

There is a difference in recognizing that you are hurt and hating them for hurting you.

[Raze]

In my opinion you should be greatfull and happy.

If I would be in your situation, I would walk up to her, thank her for showing her true colors and calmly tell her how greatfull I am that she showed me that she's not great couples material. In addition I would tell her that I am extremely thankfull that it's over between her and me and that I am so happy I wont have to deal with the consequenses of the unhealthy and toxic relation I would have had with her. Then I'd hug her, thank her one more time and with a big smile on my face say: "sayonara" and walk away from her, calmly and with great dignity, my head up high, while she's standing there her jaw hitting the floor.

Now you may think that's silly, but in all honesty, that's the biggest slap in the face you can give her (and it'll make you feel good to, because you took the power back she had over you).

Don't believe me? Try it.

Thank you for the advice. =) I'm going to try this.

[frenzy]

yea its normal nothing ever comes out good when i talk about my ex, everytime i think i about her i wish her dead X0