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Thread: Am I crazy for for being this offended...?

  1. #1
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    Am I crazy for for being this offended...?

    I have recently moved out of my girlfriends place, and I was over visiting her, and I incidentally noticed that she had some leftover food, and I asked her for some. She offered it to me, and I asked her if she missed cooking for me, to which she said no.

    I found this offensive cuz she told me while i lived with her that she loved cooking for me, so I started questioning whether she actually enjoyed it or not alltogether. Than I asked her whether she misses ANYTHING that she enjoyed doing, and she replied, only stuff that makes her heart soar!

    Than I told her that I am hurt, as I would like to believe that I can penetrate a deep part of her soul and affect her like this. I explained that she affects me like this, and although we dont live together anymore, there is surely a part of me that misses her. So she replied that I am putting on too much pressure for her to give me a response, and that I am starting a fight needlessly.

    She also mentioned that this reminded here of her childhood where she constantly had to prove to her parents that she loved them, or she wouldnt get back love.

    I told her that I have no such expectation of her, but it does hurt me to believe that I dont affect her profoundly at least on some level.

    Am I crazy for being this offended?

  2. #2
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    when i lived with my s/o i loved cooking for him...but then he started taking it for granted. We then moved out and he came across to my mothers and i cooked for him sometimes then and enjoyed it but i actually enjoyed not having to think about what to buy to cook or the fact it took me 45 mins to make the meal and it would be gone in 5minutes.
    I wouldnt be offended

  3. #3
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    vashti is offline Hot love muffin guru
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    Quote Originally Posted by sammyj View Post
    I

    Am I crazy for being this offended?
    Yes. Don't ask questions when you don't want to hear the answer.

    Do you really think she should live for cooking you meals? Many people consider household chores to be mundane and a nuissance. I suppose she also should be upset over not getting to do your laundry anymore, too?

    What household chore did you do for her? Did you do anything that she should miss? Maybe there was a lack of reciprocity. That sucks the joy out of doing any acts of kindness.

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    Why are you acting like a needy little bitch?

  5. #5
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    Were you living with her out of convenience? Why did you move out?
    “Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist”--George Carlin

  6. #6
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    She liked cooking for you because she felt appreciated and loved, and it was her way of showing the same back.

    The relationship is over, thus the enjoyment of doing nice things for you is over.

    Why don't you next ask her if she misses washing the skids out of your BVDs?

  7. #7
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    Wait, are you still together and you just moved out? I think you should not have taken it so seriously that she said that. Or at least not show how much it affected you. When people are truthful and give the answer you don't want to hear, you have to suck it up, and not make your problems their problems.
    Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world

    -Lily Tomlin

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