senior/freshman relationship need advice

[daqid]

i'm 17 years old, i'm a senior, and i have a one year old son, me and the mother have been through a lot of stuff but it just didn't work out. even though i'm only 17 i've been through a lot of stuff and seen a lot of things. i'm a laid back person most of the time and get along with everyone. i turn 18 in july. i was planning on just chilling this year when it came to the ladies but about a month after this year started i was in 4th period about 5 minutes from the bell ringing, i had just came downstairs to the gym from the weight room. our gym got two weight lifting classes and two pe classes all at once so the gym was always full. i was putting my jewelry on when this freshman came up and introduced herself to me and was like she like me and want to talk to me. i didn't think nothing of it i was just gonna add her to my f*** buddy list but as the days went by she was waving at me in the halls every time she seen me and was witting me notes and then even started waiting for me by the door in the morning till i get there and walk with me. even to the point where her step mom and her dad broke up and she was supposed to move with her dad but stayed with her step mom cause of me. talking led to flirting and flirting led to dating. we eventually became the Angelina and brad pit of our school lol. all of the girls that i just used to mess with really hate her and all of the boys that been wanting her really hate me. we could of been the cutest couple if there was that category in our yearbook. we've had one or two disagreements but we're still really close. the problem is we can only see each other in school cause her step mom don't like me cause i got a son. her real mom and her dad does like me (for whatever reason) but she don't live with any of them. i really like her and she likes me too shes even told me she loved me a couple of time while texting each other but i don't say it back, she would text something like "you know i love you right? let me chill." then i would say something like "aww you so sweet". she has never asked me why i haven't said it back or anything. i've used that word before and it didn't turn out good (how i ended up with my son) so i haven't said it to her even though i have strong feelings for her. but now its the end of the year and i'm gonna graduate and shes just a freashman. i don't know what do to and she don't either. what should we do?

please any advice will help.

[Gigabitch]

Wow. Well, circumstances aside, I think she's too young for you, and with you graduating this year, your world is going to be very different from hers. Even if her family all adored you and you didn't have all of this other stuff going on in your personal life, I would advise you to gently let her go.

[lesa]

i really like her and she likes me too shes even told me she loved me a couple of time while texting each other but i don't say it back, she would text something like "you know i love you right? let me chill." then i would say something like "aww you so sweet". she has never asked me why i haven't said it back or anything. i've used that word before and it didn't turn out good (how i ended up with my son) so i haven't said it to her even though i have strong feelings for her. but now its the end of the year and i'm gonna graduate and shes just a freashman. i don't know what do to and she don't either. what should we do?

You said, "I love you" and ended up with a son? Whoa. Just playing.

Let her go. Maybe you can sort the relationship you have with the baby's mother. How's that relationship?

[daqid]

my relationship with my babymama isn't that good. we can't get along at all. she cheated with her sister's husband and even when we tried to work that out, she figured i was gonna get her back so then she started asking me who i'm talking to and going through all of my stuff and have people spy on me, just ridiculous things. shes spoiled and thinks she can control me, she doesn't listen anyone. i'm black and shes white and mexican so we bump heads when it comes to raising our son. bottom line, we can't agree on anything. no chance of us getting back together.


Gigabitch thats the thing. i know our worlds is very different but i've broken up with someone in the past on good terms and i ended up regretting it. she doesn't want to break up with me though and i don't want to hurt her. i'm so confused.

[Il Cattivo]

Damn, I don't know what to tell you, but this relationship seems to be the least of your worries.
Right now, I don't know what your baby mama's doing, but you should focus as much as you can on your son.
Bring some money in, give him some opportunities, instead of playing prom king at the high school.
I'm sorry to say it, but your days of being king of the quad should have ended the minute that kid popped out.
In my opinion, you have responsibilities to your son first and foremost, and if this high school girl wants to hang out in the background or help you out, I don't think there's any harm in that, as long as your relationship doesn't interfere with providing for your son.

[keepitreal]

Okay so this is a tough one. However, you guys are both young and extremely young. You should split amicably. Where are you going to school? Are you moving away? Make sure someone signs a waiver that you can have sex with her once you turn 18, otherwise you can end up as a sex offender. If you are going away to school you have two options... you can 1. try to make it work, but it will fade OR 2. break up now. I know #2 will be very hard bc when you love someone (which you do) it's very hard to step back and see the big picture. Another important aspect is that she is a Freshman. She's a baby, and she has her whole hs career ahead of her. Where do you see yourself with her? Also, she doesn't need to be a stepmom at 15. I m not dissing you however, that was your mistake, and its unfair to put it on a 3rd teenager. Be the bigger person, step away, focus on yourself and providing for your child. If it's meant to be you guys will come back together. Plus, you, and def her, are way too young for a serious relationship. You're changing and growing every moment. What you like today WILL NOT be what you like tmr. Focus on yourself and your dreams. The rest will fall into place.

Also of course she doesnt wanna break up she s a kid, she ll think its the end of the world. Be the bigger person, let it go. You two are in such diff places its not even funny.

[daqid]

thanks for the help. my son has been living with me since he was born. my babymama was but we couldn't get along so she left. hes with me most of the time when i'm not working cause shes the kind of person that gets mad and takes it out on him and we're arguing most of the time. i do everything for that boy, ironically hes the only thing i never have a problem with. hes always my first priority. but its like i got all this stuff going on at home everyday, working, arguing, studying, cleaning up after my son, my doctor keep telling me that my blood pressure is too high to be so young, always being stressed out, when i get to school, the moment i walk in the door till the time i leave is so relaxing, yes, school is relaxing. see heres the thing, i live in North Carolina, full of raciest people. even the black people act like they better then others. i'm moved down here from new york when i was a freshman and was like "what the ****?". and she moved down here from st lous about 2 years ago. i think thats why we get along so good. i can't put with the people around here and shes always arguing with her peers. i'm going to community college when i graduate i'm not moving anywhere cause of my son. we live in two different worlds but have a lot in common and get along so well together.

is there like something we can do to figure this all out?

[daqid]

any suggestions? we got three days of school left till eoc testing.