need some advice. Should I be jealous?

[Cantthinkofone]

I keep catching my boyfriend (who Ive been living with for years) looking at pictures of girl's he knows (including a girl who was flirting with him so blatantly after we were together that he himself stop talking to her who he said he couldn't really stand) then at nude pictures then masturbating to porn.

We both work from home so the only time he can really do things like that is when I am asleep on the couch while he is on the computer, but I often wake up when I sleep and see him doing that.

When I call him on it he says he is sick of me not trusting him (which I always did until he started doing this, and its not that I think he is going to have an affair, a lot of these friends of his don't even live in our state and I dont think he is the type to cheat, I just dont like it) or he laughs guiltily and tries to act all cute about getting caught and knowing I wasnt sleeping etc.

It really bothers me. How do I make that clear without him worming out of it? And is it okay to be jealous about this?

(Just some background info:
The girls he looks at are not as physically attractive as I am.
He has been very jealous towards me in the past. Part of that is because he thinks I a out of his league and part because he has a tendancy towards being jealous in general.
I didnt like him watching porn to begin with, but he kept doing it anyway and said - like most people - that all men do it. So I agreed to let him and not bitch at him about it, but he knows how I feel about him looking at his friends then jerking off)

[vashti]

I'm a little uncomfortable with the idea of you giving him permission to masturbate to porn. I mean, of COURSE he's going to do it, but shouldn't he be sneaking around a bit to do it? It's a matter of tradition!

And yeah, I'd be jealous about him masturbating to people he knows in front of me.

[Rollerderby]

Maybe next time you catch him, you could give him a surprise BJ

[Yggdrasil]

OK, this is a guy's opinion:

Looking at pictures of girls I know, I would consider mental cheating. Looking at pictures of girls I know and masturbating to them would be even worse.

Looking at generic nude pictures or generic porn and masturbating to them, that's rather common behaviour. Not all men do it, but a lot. It could indicate certain sexual needs are not being met. What bothers me is that he's doing it behind your back and when you call him on it, that he's (like Gottfried said) pulling the "you should trust me" card, which is totally unfair.

A third thing I don't like about your post is the jealousy thing. Jealousy implies emotional immaturity.

All together it's not the end of the world, but there's certainly quite some room for improvement there in your relation with him.

I think he should drop the schoolboy attitude and have a mature talk with you about all this if he's serious about his relation with you. That's what people who respect and love eachother tend to do. Talk about those things.

[Gigabitch]

You both work from home so neither of you gets any private time. This is going to smother your relationship.

Are you sure he's really wanking off to pictures of his friends? That's concerning. If it's just random porn women, it doesn't matter- that's just visual stimulation, but pics of people he knows is quite another story.

[WantsItToWork]

you should be fooling around with him more...if you had sex with him atleast once a day none of this would happen.

[Cantthinkofone]

I want to have sex all the time... thats not the problem