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Thread: Asking a woman's father for her hand in marriage

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    Asking a woman's father for her hand in marriage

    Tradition in that aspect is important to her, I'd rather not ask but I guess I want to, to make her happy. Her as well as her brother say I have nothing to worry about, however I'm a bit nervous, don't know really what to say or where to begin. Help!

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    I think its a very nice gesture that demonstrates a lot of respect for yourself, your lady and her family, and your future relationship.

    It can also set the tone for your future interaction w/your in-laws. So, how you proceed will really depend on the specifics of your relationship.

    Are you physically close to her parents? Does she have a good relationship with them? Do you? Will you enjoy their help as grandparents? What is your status relative to her father? Are you a professional in your own right? Is he? Are there cultural considerations you need to be making (are they a different culture from you?).

    This site has various ages/culture/experience posting. Think about these things and get back to us.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
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    Let me put it this way-

    He's asked her when I'm going to ask him (about the question at hand in this thread)

    He also said I'm the answer to his prayers. Needless to say, I'm really close to her whole family.

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    Is that supposed to clear something up for me? LOL.

    Why don't the two of you take her parents (and yours) out for a nice intimate dinner someplace? Then, over some wine, make a toast to her parents, and to yours. Thank them for being a part of your lives.

    Then, announce your intention to marry this gal. Ask her father for her hand and tell him how proud and happy you would be if he said yes.

    Be sincere and yourself. I'm sure the rest will work out just fine.

    Good luck.

    PS - why couldn't your future wife make this suggestion to you herself? Do you have to do all the thinking for both of you in this relationship?
    Last edited by IndiReloaded; 20-06-09 at 05:40 AM.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

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    If he has already made it clear that he wants you to marry her daughter, what are you worried about? Maybe that's a sign of immaturity...
    Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world

    -Lily Tomlin

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    Quote Originally Posted by Rollerderby View Post
    If he has already made it clear that he wants you to marry her daughter, what are you worried about? Maybe that's a sign of immaturity...
    Or that he doesn't really want to marry this gal?
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

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    Quote Originally Posted by IndiReloaded View Post
    Or that he doesn't really want to marry this gal?
    Don't agree with that, why would being nervous or whatever you'd call it to ask her father about something this big have anything to do with not wanting it in reality?

    Quote Originally Posted by Rollerderby View Post
    If he has already made it clear that he wants you to marry her daughter, what are you worried about? Maybe that's a sign of immaturity...
    How's that immaturity? See above response.

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    Your welcome for the rest of the advice.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

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    It's actualy a pretty simple matter of taking your balls in your hand, walking up to him and saying: Sir, I'd like to ask for your permision to marry your daughter.

    Let go of your balls before you start talking, or it may come out of your mouth in a high pitched voice.

    All the rest is in your mind.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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    I think I'd word it like this:

    I plan to ask your daughter to marry me, and it would mean a lot to me if I had your (and your wife's) blessing.

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