just friends ... or not ....

[H4D3S]

So here i go with my story

So i know a girl for about 3 years now. We were just friends, we both had a relationship. Me for almost a year and she for almost 2 years. Mine ended like about 1.5 years ago and hers almost 4 months. The guy she was with still wants her back and she really doesn't feel confortable when he is around. He didn't even tell his parents thet the relationship is over (and yeah im talking about now after 4 months). She told me once she didn't want to hurt him beceauce he is a good guy, but the relationship didn't work anymore. She also told me she really doesn't want to tell him if she would have a new relationship becaus the guy is still really jealous when she is around other guys and stuff. She shouldn't care that much but she does.

now with some background here comes the story

For the last weeks me and that girl are getting real close. We are becoming real good friends. We agreed on doing some stuff to fool our friends. The id was to let them believe we are in love but didn't have a relationship. It worked suprisingly good and all of our friends believe it. Now the weird part about it we didn't had to to anything special for it everything just came as it was.

Even when we are not around our friends (just the 2 of us) we do special stuff. eg. On a night she was at my place we were watching a movie and we were both on the couch. We were lying togheter and for some reason we started to caress eachother a bit it was sexual or anything just a bit on the hands, arms and belly.

Even tho she said to me she doesn't want a relationship, and she doesn't got any feelings towards me or something and she said she hopes i haven't got any feelings for her.

I'm getting kind of confused here, Why are we so close and do things "normal" friends don't, could there be more then friendship and is she supressing her feelings or am i just making things to difficult

i don't know that to do or think anymore


(sorry for my poor english)

[bivio]

Your English is okay.

I have a similar relationship, it wouldn't surprise me if she did really have feelings for you. She might be worried that you don't have feelings for her.. Do you have those feelings for her?, do you wish for you two to be more than friends?...

Just keep everything to same, if it's meant to be it's meant to be, maybe if you do have those feelings express them a little bit more.

[H4D3S]

I guess its over

she said to me she doesn't want it any more because she is affraid it ends up wrong and she doesn't want to become superficial friends again (like in the early days)

she doesn't want it to stop but she's just so affraid ....

so what can I do, its over i think ...

[KaWaiiSkYe]

Talk to her again. She's maybe confused and she doesn't want to hurt you or sumin.

[Ratfish256]

Just tell her how you feel. It will take a big load off your chest and she may just be afraid that you don't like her.

[H4D3S]

i would but it's only she sais to me when i have feelings for her its all over and we can't be good friends anymore because she doesn't feel confortable around me then anymore

so i am to affraid to tell her with a great chanse of losing her even as a good friend

[Ratfish256]

Thats quite a pickle, but I would still do it. Theres no reason that people should hide feeling or play games like that. After I started being open with my feelings things have gotten better for me.

[H4D3S]

k but i can be losing a good friend here


is it really worth that ???

[bivio]

Her sayin she can't be good friends normally means she has too strong feelings for you and just doesn't want to be hurt.

Talk to her

[2deepinluv2stop]

I'm kinda in the exact same situation, and I'm learning the best thing to do is move on...

[H4D3S]

@ 2deep : move on like forgetting about it ??

@ bivio : she wants to be good friends, but not that good like in my story is told, its really weird because a few days ago it was all different like now. It almost seems that she is affraid of me ...


[EDIT]
hmm this morning she sent me a message, could you check out our computer this evening it is acting weird (she is telling that for a few days now that the thing is going bezerk)

am I just the repairguy or is there something more to it ???

[H4D3S]

hmm some new things happend this weekend

one night we were at my house, and the same thing happend again like other nights we were togheter

alltough she said earlier this week she didn't want to come over anymore and do things like that ...

someone said to me : I think she is falling for you but you are good friends now and she i think she might be affraid to lose that ...

Could it make any sence ???

[Alla_Aleks]

You are acting ....mmm..as a fool (sorry). She's waiting for your first step. All she wants is you starting the relationship with her. Don't be in a doubt and take the plunge.

[H4D3S]

I talked to her about everything

she said she didn't want a new relationship now and is happy the way it is, she doesn't want commitment in a relationship. she wants to do what she wants and enjoy the special moments ...
And doesn't want to take the risk of losing a friend in case it doesn't work out between us ...


so i guess i know now, but i still can't set my mind of that little bit of doubt...


no offence taken alla, but you were wrong about it tho