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Thread: should i bother?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Posts
    1

    should i bother?

    sorry for this being so long, and thank you so much for reading it if you do

    a new girl moved to my town from a town not too far away. we share many interests and get along great. ive liked many other girls in the past and had a relationship, but she is the one who ive got along the best with. we are very close friends and i was thinking about asking her out.

    but as it turns out, she has had many guy friends in the past with this same story. since she is attractive, for one reason or another many men had flocked to her in the past claiming to be her friend. each one of them had asked her out and failed, in which they then proceeded to ignore her and destroy the friendship. she is sick of it, and generally avoids men who like her if the feeling isnt mutual.

    lol, to get a better understanding, i guess you could say im one of the only men who hasnt asked her out XD....mainly because i know of that knowledge.

    she had an ex boyfriend in the past who had drug habits. she didnt want to partake in these drug habits, so she left him. even after moving away though, she still yearned for him and told him that she still wanted to be with im as long as he doesnt do drugs anymore. lately, she's been trying to keep up a relationship with him with his promise being that he will stop doing drugs. however she also had learned that not only is he lying about the drug thing, but he has also been seeing other women. she tells me all this and yet refuses to me that they are actually dating.

    they arent dating, but she is trying. a part of her still wants him but its just barely hanging in there...which has caused her to deny men who asked her out even if she rly does like them back.

    because of all this, i learned that my emotions for her is a sort of unrequited love. she trusts me enough to tell me all this, which could mean that she doesnt expect me to ask her out.

    for the sake of keeping this from getting too long, lets just say ive had my reasons for thinking she may like me. including myself being extremely similar to another man she has admitted to like.

    but because of her attachment to her boyfriend and her trust for me, ive backed off and decided to keep friendship over risking dating. i would rather be her friend and have her then risk failing a confession and losing her for good.

    every now and then, she moves back to her old town, not for her ex but for her old friends. of course she still sees her ex, but that isnt the main attraction. one way or another, the point is he is there.

    this summer she decided to go down for the great majority of the summer and stay with her old friends. yet recently she's been talking to me online from her family's house in the other town quite often.

    a few nights back i talked to her all night casually online. she suddenly signed off using an excuse that someone was going to pick her up and go somewhere apparently late at night. since im her friend on facebook as well, i noticed her post that she is coming back to my town since her old town is boring her (of course her old friends werent so happy but thats besides the point XP).

    i cant help but think she's coming back up here for me. and theres never been a time she was in her old town being bored. i also know that her relationship with her ex boyfriend has become one-sided, since he isnt too happy with her trying to change him. because of that their relationship is hanging on by a thread with her being the only thing holding on.

    now for my problem. my feelings came back, and i dont know what to do about it. after my first girlfriend, i havent been able to get another for years because of situations exactly like this but with other girls.

    my methods for seeing if a girl likes me, is hanging out with them alot and throwing some signs at them and see if they respond positively. she's responded positively in the past so i had my reasons to believe she was interested. in doing this though, i learned of her status with her ex.

    idk what to do. should i try to forget about ever liking her? or should i go for it?

    in simpler words, should i ignore these feelings im getting back? or should i follow them?

    if i added any more details, i dont think anyone could read something this long XD so ill stop here

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    1,236
    Wow, sounds like a real winner there. Let's see, she rejected lots of guys for a guy with questionable drug habits. Well, it's up to my friend. If you are willing to worth your friendship to be with her, then go for it.



    Oh, what the hell? Stop being a pussy and ask her out. Life is short, just do it.
    I will do my best to reply with an educated, humble and honest answer. Ultimately, it is up to you whether you want to listen to my advice or ignore it completely. Sometimes, my advice may be wrong; occasionally, it will be right. Regardless, I want to do my best to give people answers they are seeking.

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