Hopelessly in love

[Trottel]

Hi everyone
I'm in love with a girl I met who was temporarily in the country. She's living in another country now (with her long term boyfriend), all we did was hang out for a while. It's hard to explain why I'm so in love with her, I can't help it though and I can't stop it.

I'm pretty sure she's figured it out (I told her friend and they like to gossip), though we haven't talked about it. It would be selfish and hopeless of me to tell her so I just have to grimace through whenever we chat/meet up.

I need advice on how to get over her, I don't want to stay like this, and I don't want to cut off communication and forget about her. I can't imagine being with someone else, it would be unfair on them, but it seems like the only way to move on.

I tend to go through ups and downs, I'll be happy and not thinking about her, then we might chat, or something will remind me of her and it'll send me crashing back down again.

Anyway, cheers

[thrillaveza]

do what you can to take your mind off of her. read a book, go out, work, work out, solve a puzzle, play video games, find a hobby etc. better yet do something that you never have done before. i think it's best to at least try to cut contact with her for now. i know it's hard, and the whole NC rule didn't work that well for me, but eventually it'll fade. for me, i'm hurting much less with my situation and feeling better about things. just do what you can to take it out of your mind,, good luck

[symphonic]

Sigh..I've been hoplessly in love for like 2 years now and i've been trying to get over it since day 4. I didn't want to cut off my connection with her either, but every time i saw her, i feel back in love. The best thing you can do is add some distance. It doesn't have to be exteme, but atleast some.

[Trottel]

We both went to the same festival recently. After saying goodbye I was of course sad, the old lump in my throat is back, but I'm much less crippled than I have been on previous occasions. I was happy to listen to music, read, study, chat, eat, laugh etc.

The first time I said goodbye I was utterly crushed.
The second time I managed to hold it together, though I didn't talk much and had some trouble getting motivation.

So it seems I'm catching up with my brain and slowly coming to terms with it, I think these posts help to get it out, it's useful to let it out (even if it is anonymously).

Thanks