Love Someone I can't have

[DreamingSoul]

Just like the title says, i'm in love with the one person I know I can't have. He's my very best friend and i've known him since middle school. We were always insperable and he was always there when I needed him. It didn't but just two years before I realized I was in love with him.

We dated of course. He had the mutual feelings but was also afraid of ruining our friendship. We dated for a year and two months but afterwards...he changed into someone I no longer knew. Hung with different crowds and no longer called....and later started flirting with other girls. He was no longer my best friend. Then right after Christmas, he ended it. Saying that he no longer felt anything for me and was confused. I was destroyed but let him have his space.

Of course we went back out a few times, but each time he felt like he didnt want to be in relationship and ended it after just a few weeks.

We're still good friends, talk now and then but each time we run into each other I find it harder to turn away. I have fallen hard for him and I can't help but love everything about him. Each time he comes around the corner I feel myself grow weak and all I can think about is how much fun we use to have together, but it seems like it never happened....

I thought I was over him until recently he told me about this girl he has really strong feelings for and hasn't had this much feelings for someone before since we were together. That just destroyed me to piece's and now I dont know what to do anymore....I was always, and still am there for him. But each time we talk all I want to do is break down and cry.

I tried dating again, but the relationships never lasted. And after hearing about each break up from my friends he would call me and always be there to cheer me up. Making it harder for me to get over him.

I'm so confused on what to do and some advice would be very appreciated. I know what we had was over but I still find myself longing for him...he's my best friend. And i'm the fool that fell for him.

[Chazza2k]

Being friends and being together are two very different things, I can see you risked your friendship hoping it would turn out well but unfortunatley it just didn't work for you both. At least you know you tried. Now its the friendship thats the problem.

The problem here I think is you are still holding onto that hope of the two of you ending up together, and your still very good friends but what you really want more. I'm not sure if you really both can be friends in such circumstances, as everytime he tells you about someone he's with its going to hurt you and take you right back to trying to get over him. I really think you should end the friendship, to allow you the time you need to move on.

Its over and if you really cannot get beyond that, I think he shouldnt be a part of your life. Its just not fair on you.

[Erika Awakening]

Well, how about having some fun and lining up dates with a bunch of other guys?

Meanwhile, nothing heals love pain faster in my experience than Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT or tapping). It's acupressure, basically, and you can do it yourself or with someone else, and it releases emotional pains of all kinds. I use it daily.

Also, who says you can't have him? YOU made that decision, no one else.