When is it 'official'?

[spursfan2110]

I kind of have two questions here.

I'm a freshman in college, and I met this awesome girl a few weeks ago. She was interested and I liked her instantly, so I asked her out on a date within a couple of days. We did typical first date stuff, movies, dinner, and sitting in front of the UT Tower before calling it a night sometime in the wee hours of the morning. That was 2 weeks ago.

So, we're both really busy but we see each other all the time, as in, every day. We hang out and we both really enjoy being around each other.

We're going out again this weekend, and here is where I'm split. I don't know if she's actually looking for a relationship or just enjoying my company. I'm considering talking to her about making it 'official' at the end of this second date, but I'm concerned that it may be too quick? What do you think?

And...while we're at it...how exactly do you go about 'making it official'?

[FullofSighs]

I say all dates are "official" since you like her and she likes you. Maybe you can try kissing her during your next date.

[spursfan2110]

Sorry, not much experience here, but how would I try kissing her without making it seem awkward if she doesn't want to...i mean...like...do i ask her, hey, can i kiss you? haha.....again, pardon my naievity.

[girl68]

I assume by official you mean boyfriend/ girlfriend?

If yes, then I think in many cases it isn't until you ask officially (for some girls anyways). Sometimes the guy makes this whole speech: how cool I am, how much he likes me blah blah blah... then asks how I'd feel about being his girlfriend. I answered yes of course.

That's one way.

[Chupacabras]

Boyfriend/girlfriend isn't official until both parties agree (say) that they are. It's been a long time since I was your age but I'd think it's probably too soon ask her to be your girlfriend.

It's not too soon to kiss her though, just move in fairly slowly like you would for a hug and read her body language; if she lets you come straight at her (remember, slowly!) she wants a kiss and if she veers to the side she doesn't.

Good luck!

[ellie]

A little bit too soon. On the other hand, there is no such thing as "when should you do this and when is the time to do that?", Every couple is different. If you guys click and you are sure she feels the same way about you, then go ahead.

But maybe follow the advice others already gave you and try & kiss her first. If you haven't already.


How do you make it official? Usually it comes natural. When you spend a lot of time together you just start calling each other bf/gf. The simplest way is probably though, just telling her "Hey I like you, can I call you my girlfriend?" or something like that.

[Wiredbomb0]

I had the same issue really.

If you don't think it's offical, then ask her if you want to be my girlfreind.
If you think it's offical, but you don't know if she thinks it's offical, then ask her if you want to be my girlfreind.

[FullofSighs]

Yeah you could do that too, or maybe kiss her on her forehead and then try moving to her cheek. She allows that, try for her lips and move on from there.

[Sanctuary]

I did something similar to what girl68 said. I was dating this girl for a few weeks and I really liked her. We were hanging out and the mood was good and I said something like, "You're a pretty cool girl and I really like hanging out with you, mind if I call you my girlfriend" or something like that. She smiled and said "yes, of course you can" or something. I remember being so nervous about asking that I felt like I was gonna die LOL. But as soon as I got into the rhythm of conversation, it was fine as long as you believe she'll say yes.