How can I tell if I'm gay?

**cameron180** · 17-10-09, 09:30 AM

What are the signs I should be looking for in myself to determine whether I'm gay or not?

Is it enough that sometimes I have sexual fantasizes about certain men giving me anal sex? If I run into a man who expresses himself in many feminine ways such as the high pitched voice or long hair, etc I sometimes fantasize about being f ed up the butt by these kinds of men when I masturbate?

I've never had sexual contact with a man in real life. So are my fantasizes a sure sign that I'm gay or bi? I may be bi because I am attracted to women too.

I also fantasize about wearing a pink skirt while a man is ****ing me up the ass.

**tjwojo** · 17-10-09, 09:37 AM

How old are you? Its possible your gay, but how do you feel about girls? Have you had any prior relationships with females? Its possible you could be bi, I say be comfortable with what every you are, labels are for soup cans

**cameron180** · 17-10-09, 09:41 AM

I'm 29 years old. I am sexually attracted to blond women. I've been in 5 relationships with women.

**survivor08** · 17-10-09, 09:57 AM

your post question drew me to read it. Now that I am here responding to it ( I am a straight male) I think you are leaning strongly on the curious side, if not gay. the dreams you have of being penetrated anally is the red flag. (not that there is anything wrong with being gay...)

I don't have those dreams, never had any dream about having a man take me from behind, and I don't think most heterosexual males have either...

Do you do other things like:
look down to see schlongs at public bathroom urinals?
spend too much time looking at good looking men?
flirting with men?

not sure if those questions are legit qualifiable questions but it sure is fun to ask...lol.

short answer, yes I think you are gay

**Charlie Boy II** · 17-10-09, 10:09 AM

yeah I'm straight. No offence, but your fantasises made me fill a bit ill. By that I just mean, as a straight man I am repulsed by the thought of being penetrated anally by another man.

The fact that you seem to quite like the idea is a very strong indicator you are at least bisexual.

**cameron180** · 17-10-09, 12:59 PM

Yeah I don't think there is anything wrong with me if I do turn out to be bisexual or gay.

However it can become a major problem with women I date. When I'm out on a date do you think I should bring it to attention to potential girlfriends that I have the potential to be gay because of my thoughts? If so how soon do I let them know about it?

**Sanctuary** · 17-10-09, 02:41 PM

I have a gay friend and I asked him once how he figured out he was gay.

His answer was that when he was younger, he was watching porn and the girl didn't really turn him on but the guy did.

Lol

**Aeradalia** · 17-10-09, 03:45 PM

When you find yourself asking questions like this... that's how you know you're gay.

**BoredGeorge** · 17-10-09, 03:46 PM

Your pretty gay.

**Bumble_bee** · 17-10-09, 04:11 PM

you're kenneth

**ellie** · 17-10-09, 05:13 PM

Sounds like you're bi to me. If you still feel attracted to females you are not gay. If you had previous relationships with girls you can still be gay. Some gays dont realize they're gay until later on in life. The question is if you still are attracted to females, if yes then you sound as if you're bi. Yeah you may want to tell a future partner/date you're bi when the opportunity arises and if you're sure that's what you are.

**vashti** · 17-10-09, 08:50 PM

I don't know why it's necessary to tell a girl you are dating that you are also attracted to men unless you are planning to be intimate with one. Not every thought needs to be expressed. I am attracted to lots of people; there isn't any reason to make someone else neurotic about it.

This is not to say you should lie about it, though, and if it comes up naturally in conversation, I might tell a girl I was pretty serious about (if I were you).

**Linli** · 18-10-09, 04:30 AM

Strange... I wonder the same thing about myself, for very similar reasons. Except that I'm a girl

. It's a weird place to be on the spectrum, though, because I feel strong sexual attraction towards girls, but I find it so stressful trying to flirt with them. I always wonder if this is normal, because I went on a date with a girl once and she basically told me that I wasn't "bi enough" for her. Are there any bisexuals on here who've experienced difficulty conveying their attractions to members of the same sex? Do you think it's probably just the very typical, WASP-esque social upbringing that prevents ease of these interactions, or am I maybe just more experimental than actually bi? It really keeps me from telling people about my feelings, because I don't want to look like a poser, haha. Isn't that awful?

**DoesntMatter** · 18-10-09, 04:40 AM

If you fantasize about buggery then you are gay

**cameron180** · 18-10-09, 08:55 AM

Well if there is potential that I'm bisexual I should probably let a woman know that upfront right?

One poster made a valid point that gays or bis usually aren't aware of it until later in life.

Even though I'm not sure that I'm bi I should let a woman know upfront that I might be bi but that I'm not sure & let her make a decision to continue dating me or leave me based on that information.

Thread: How can I tell if I'm gay?

Thread Tools

How can I tell if I'm gay?

Posting Permissions