Hung out a few times, kissed, what now???

[pisces7378]

I've been single for 7 months. Well, I've been out on some dates, and even had a little "fling" with this one girl, but in general, I've considered myself a single man for at least the past 7 months.

Now, I've met a new girl. I got her number and I started texting her.

As it turns out, she actually lives 5 doors down from me on my street. So I texted her one night and asked if she felt like coming by for a beer. She agreed and came right over. She ended up leaving at 7:30 in the morning. We just talked and hung out. I did loan her a hooded Adidas sweatshirt (that she took home with her) and I did sort of put my hands on her knees while we were talking. There was some tension there. But not that much; enough that she knew I wasn't just into her as a buddy. I tend to rush into things, so I wanted to take this slow.

So... after that, she just went home, and I didn't text her for a few days. Maybe even a week. But then I invited her to spend the day with me at a friend's Fall Apple Festival where we drank homemade apple cider, listened to live blue grass, and ate BBQ. It was great. And when we left the festival, we went and got some more beer, and went over to her house, and ended up hanging out and talking until 1:30 am. Except this time, I made dinner for her (I work in Marketing, but trained as a chef for 4 years in Europe), and we made out for just about 3-4 minutes or so on her porch as I left.

So, I left thinking that everything was looking A-Okay. I said to myself, "I'll give it a day or two so that she doesn't feel like I'm just going to start calling her everyday, but then I am going to try to see this girl again soon."

So I waited, and then texted her two days later that I had a really nice time at the Apple Festival with her. She didn't respond at all. So 2 days later I asked her when she was getting off work, and she said she didn't have to work. So I asked her if she felt like doing something, and she said that she would, but she already has plans. So I said, "Aw, that's a shame. Some other time then." And she hasn't responded.

Now, some (or even most) of you are probably thinking, "Jeez dude, back off. You are over-thinking this." I know that I never asked her any specific questions that she needs to respond to. But, it just feels like I have done 100% of the contacting here, and she is just sitting back, flipping me little crumbs; making no effort.

Did I play it "too cool" by waiting so long after seeing her each time to text her? A girlfriend of mine said that by me not texting her the next day after we kissed, that was a rejection, and it probably turned her off at least a little.
I don't want to seem like I'm playing games. What can I do to make her know that I would like to see her again? I want to see her again, but I don't want to seem like a doormat.

[Primo]

Did I play it "too cool" by waiting so long after seeing her each time to text her? A girlfriend of mine said that by me not texting her the next day after we kissed, that was a rejection, and it probably turned her off at least a little

You may get some differing opinions, but yes I agree with your girlfriend, you played it too cool imo.

If she likes you alot it can be recovered, showing a girl you "want" her is not being a doormat dude, c'mon ! Go let her know you want her !!

[pisces7378]

I hope not. I just texted her, "Hey, I've been thinking about it, and that DVD I let you borrow is a total dude film. In fact, don't watch it. At least, not unless I'm there." (I loaned her "Stand by Me" on DVD; she'd never seen it.)

She wrote back, "Ha, how would you being there make it any less of a total dude film?"

And I wrote back, "Hmmmm... Good point. Maybe my testosterone would somehow make the dudeliness of the film seem appropriate??? Maybe I just want to watch it with you."

So yeah, okay, my last text didn't make much sense. But it was supposed to be a little ridiculous. My main point was the last sentence "Maybe I just want to watch it with you."

Anyway, I just sent her another text that said, "Come on now. This is where you are supposed to say, "Well *******, would you like to come over for lunch Saturday? We can carve a pumpkin and watch a dvd.""

Is that lame?

[Primo]

Hey lame or not, you let her know you're interested. If it was her texting you something lame you wouldn't care, you'd be happy she texted you right? :-) I think it was a good move, if she's into you, you'll be watching the movie and getting to know her better soon.

[pisces7378]

Argh!!! You are probably right. She had to know that I was into her when I asked her out to the Apple Festival. She did stay at my house until 7:30 am, and she did take my hooded sweatshirt with her. She definitely liked me when she came out on the porch and let me kiss her.

I am just trying to figure out what happened between the kiss and right now that makes her so stand off'ish via text. I mean, we had both had too much to drink when we kissed. But she wasn't wasted, and neither was I. I am sure that it wasn't my best Don Juan kiss, but I didn't like burp in her mouth or slobber all over her. It was nice, or at least I felt it was.

Anyway... this shit may be what girls LOVE; drama, games, tension, ARGH!!!! But I F'ing hate it.