What makes women....

[CocoChanel]

Thank you sir! But...
I would look weird as a Vampire, yes?

[IndiReloaded]

jen, pweeeese don't debate with Indi, she's way to frickin' smart :-P

As for Indi, I've given up...it's a deep seated Canadian girl genius type thing, I'll have to explain one day :-D

If you must know, Primo (you don't but I'll share anyway):

You remind me a bit too much of someone. I've learned to set boundaries with gentlemen like you. I may be too 'frickin smart', but YOU are way too frickin charming for my own good.

[Moe]

I'm not the best looking guy in the world for sure. I can talk to anyone about anything and make you laugh, even hot women. The difference is it seems the better looking ones are usually stuck-up and will just ignore you and walk away.(Their ignorance not mine) Usually by the end of the night they are still standing looking stuck up. My record of so called closing the deal I have to work on I usually end up with a good friend not always what I want.

Unapproachable?

what holds you guys back from approaching a woman?

I'm getting to thinking it can't be all about a guys nerves, maybe its the way some women carry themeselves, the way they look, talk etc.... sometimes I wonder what it is about me that stops guys from coming up to me and trying to have a conversation with me, or even asking me out.....

[CocoChanel]

Primo and Indi o.O
Wooooohooooo!!!
This is getting interesting.

Come on Indi. Don't you want a peek of that HOT SEXY MAN?
You know you do.

[IndiReloaded]

at first i thought your point was that we have to be strong and work very hard to gain respect, however i was trying to imply that i feel all people deserve respect. anyways, after rereading i thought you meant more like if you respect yourself you will be respectable. however, you werent very clear, so yes can you clarify?

Well, first off I disagree with your point that all people deserve my respect. That is a very naive opinion.

Gaining my respect means I have judged your quality, abilities or achievements as something worthy of my admiration. Not everyone meets my criteria. But its an important evaluation for me to make b/c those who do meet my criteria are given a higher priority in my mental queue. In practical terms, it means I am more likely to give them my time and attention. Since I value those things and they are limited, it is not something I give lightly.

That doesn't mean I don't care about people. I do. In fact, I strongly believe all humans are entitled to certain basic rights. But my respect isn't one of those rights. That is something that is earned.

Respecting yourself means you conduct yourself as if you have value. By 'taking it for yourself' I mean that noone else can decide this for you. It also has to be reasonable. You have to know your own value, and in what context. Since most people desire things that have value, this will increase your attractiveness in all sorts of situations. Including those involving the opposite sex.

So, getting back to your specific issue: What is it about you that is deserving of respect? The fact you exist? LOL. No. You have to do a bit better than that to be interesting to other people.

[IndiReloaded]

Primo and Indi o.O
Wooooohooooo!!!
This is getting interesting.

Come on Indi. Don't you want a peek of that HOT SEXY MAN?
You know you do.

I already have my own hot sexy man. I considered a male harem once; its too hard to manage two. He's all yours beautiful Coco.

[CocoChanel]

LOL! No kidding.
That's why I don't get how men can tolerate cheating.

And don't be facetious. You don't think I'm "beautiful".
You said I was ugly and a wannabe, yes?

[IndiReloaded]

If that is your photo in your avatar, I still think you look like those video pop singers, yes. Too much makeup, IMO. But I never said you were ugly, only that I am not jealous.

[CocoChanel]

I don't though. You are just putting me in that category.
It's an insult to me because I am no where near that.
And I wear make up but not a lot of it either.
I have clients that could back me up on that one.

[IndiReloaded]

Clients? LOL are you a Sugar Baby?

Is that your pic or not? If yes, my opinion stands. Too much makeup. Shrug.

[CocoChanel]

LMAO!! No Not like that!!
I have a little side hustle in Cosmetology.
Hair and Makeup. I have several clients.


Adding...
Oh and yes it is the bigger one is in my gallery.

[IndiReloaded]

Well, cosmetology would explain the makeup. And yes, I do think you are beautiful. I'm not a guy, but if I had to choose a photo that you looked most natural in, it would be the one of you in the pink coat.

Anyway, don't take my video girl comment too seriously. Its just my opinion, and an old married woman's at that.

[CocoChanel]

Thanks a lot!
Yeah I love cosmetology and I have no one to practice on so I often use my own face. LOL
I have pictures of me with no make up on.
I think I've only posted it once.

[CocoChanel]

Okay I DID IT

[jenniferx]

Well, first off I disagree with your point that all people deserve my respect. That is a very naive opinion.

Gaining my respect means I have judged your quality, abilities or achievements as something worthy of my admiration. Not everyone meets my criteria. But its an important evaluation for me to make b/c those who do meet my criteria are given a higher priority in my mental queue. In practical terms, it means I am more likely to give them my time and attention. Since I value those things and they are limited, it is not something I give lightly.

That doesn't mean I don't care about people. I do. In fact, I strongly believe all humans are entitled to certain basic rights. But my respect isn't one of those rights. That is something that is earned.

Respecting yourself means you conduct yourself as if you have value. By 'taking it for yourself' I mean that noone else can decide this for you. It also has to be reasonable. You have to know your own value, and in what context. Since most people desire things that have value, this will increase your attractiveness in all sorts of situations. Including those involving the opposite sex.

So, getting back to your specific issue: What is it about you that is deserving of respect? The fact you exist? LOL. No. You have to do a bit better than that to be interesting to other people.

Okay, I think I do understand what you mean and i believe we both have slightly different definitions of respect. I think initially I said that i want respect from a guy. I think its safe to assume that despite a few people here and there respect is what we want from a partner. I didnt say i DESERVE respect, notice the difference? I also think respect is pretty subjective and if I'm in a good relationship and have been a good girlfriend or whatever, then yes I wont tolerate not being respected and it would clearly be better to end things. As for what I believe you're saying, yes in many ways you have to build respect in order to achieve it. but i think before someone proves themselves otherwise, it is good to give people the benefit of the doubt and at least listen to what they have to say before making judgements. and yeah i just realized i was slightly mixing respect with basic human rights, which is where i went on my little rant, but anyway, yes i want respect from a partner, which i believvvve goes back to what i was originally saying.