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Thread: ex-girlfirend wanted space - ADVICE PEASE

  1. #1
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    ex-girlfirend wanted space - ADVICE PEASE

    Hi,

    this is my first post, and i need advice on weather this is a good idea, bad idea, weather if this will work or not...

    iv been with my girlfriend for about 2 years, we were unbreakable, best friends, had alot in common and had good plans for the future. she recently broke up with me about a month ago by saying those dreaded words 'I NEED SPACE' or 'I CANT BE IN A RELATIONSHIP RIGHT NOW'. i understand why she said that, i was being possesive over the last month we were together, we may have spent too much time with eachother, i became dependant on her, jelousy also struck a bit over inocent scenes. when she said she needed space i spent the 2 days terrorising her with texts, tried so hard to make things work out but i realized it wasnt gona get me anywhere.
    the next day i sent her an email telling her i will give her her space and that i hope things will work out. she replied she thinks things will work out and that she does think we will be together, but just not right now. also she said its ok for us to text eachother now and then to see how we are doing.
    a week then passed and i emailed her from work seeing if she wants to see a movie 'as friends'. she accepted, which made me very happy. after the weekend i then emailed her and said 'what time are you finished work' so i could meet her before the cinema. she then said that she doesnt think its a good idea yet to meet up which tore my heart to shreads! she said we should give it another 2 weeks and maybe go for a drink. also she said she still cares about me and thinks about me alot but said she is happy being on her own at the moment. at this point i am confused weather she wants to be with me again or just try and be friends. she said she has been happy being on her own for the past 3 weeks, i told her i was happy, but i really am not happy and really want this to work out...

    what should i do for the next 2 weeks? should i cut off al contact and wait till she writes to me? or should i still text her once a week?

    and when i do meet up with her for a drink, what should i do? im not used to this so some advice would be good...

    many thanks.

  2. #2
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    Stop all contact and use this time to take a brutally honest look at yourself. Go buy a notebook or journal and write everything your feeling and thinking down. Who have you been in this relationship?who so you want to be? What needs to change? What is unchangable?

    Good luck!

  3. #3
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    iv been through this. i know what iv done wrong, and i know what to change.
    i cant lose her because she was my good friend for 4 years, 2 years before we were together. i feel she is not giving me the chance to show her i can make her happy. i feel if this 'space' thing goes on for too long the chances of me being together with her again are drifting away by the day.

    thanks for the advice anyway

  4. #4
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    I'm not trying to get you down, but to be honest I wouldn't be thinking about what you may do when you have drinks. From the sound of it, it doesn't look like it's going to happen. 2 years is 2 years, but it seems like she's done and moving (moved) on.

    It happens, sometimes people with 5, 8, 10+ years together just leave and never look back...

  5. #5
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    any other advice??

    is it a good idea to stay friends with her even? or should i shut her off if she suggests it?

  6. #6
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    I usually insert a descriptive narrative of things you wouldn't be able to handle, but yes, suffice to say, you can't be friends with your ex.

  7. #7
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    "I need space" = it's over

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