Post here instead of contacting your EX!

[ChristianonLI]

Nothing works, Chrisy. I've tried. I do feel it is worth it. If the only condition for her coming back was amputation of limbs, I'd do it. Just like in Saw, too, if required. If the only condition was being publicly whipped every day like in medieval times, I would march to the town square with the whip in my hand and a smile on my face. If I had to sleep naked in the snow for her, I would. Every night.

Maybe I've reached a point of delusion, I'm not sure. But all I know is I feel completely, utterly empty inside and I would do anything to fill that void back up as fast as possible.

I've done some research on hypnosis to completely forget she exists and while it seems possible, it is not recommended. Still, I may do it anyway. If forgetting her and forgetting the last two years, forgetting the wedding and the honeymoon, is what it takes to at least bandage that void, then I need to do it. Either that or keep praying for a miracle from God.

[dlinepassion]

I wish I could tell her how much I miss her. Even her annoying habits that I lived with for almost a year and dealed with for a year and a half before that. I wish I could say how much I love her. And how thinking about her makes my heart beat faster but my stomach turn and my eyes teary. I know how you feel Christian about doing anything to get her back. I thought she was my one and only and now I'm in so much pain I can't even think about anything else.

I hope this helps everyone because I understand where you all are coming from

[Moe]

Well you'all got me to respond here. It's been three months and I've tried no contact several times and she keeps calling me I know I don't have to answer but it's the respect and gentleman in me. I've not contacted her but maybe 3-4 times.
She calls me with the dumbest things only an excuse to call. She won't see me, talk about us just bull s**t. I've tried to return all her stuff she says why do you want to do that. She says she still loves me. I do still love her.
In my past when I've been dumped I always just ended it, N/C forever, I just can't do it with her, Why?
When I ended relationships I've always been a gentlemen and supportive of my Ex's and respected them.

[lhn]

I'm with all you guys & gals on here. ChristianonLi... I was where you are about 2months ago and man I feel for you. Is this the first time you have been heartbroken? It was my first time...
Worst time of my life without doubt and something that has shaped my future in so many different ways.
Unfortunately there is nothing that will speed up the healing process or turn back time, no matter how much you want to be able to. Just know that lots of people are sharing your pain and lots have got through it.

I know personally, that when I have my next relationship there is a ton of stuff I will do differently. I wish I had my new found maturity in my last relationship but I'm moving on little by little everyday.

Back on thread topic (sorry, didn't mean to derail it)... just coming on this site helps me. I'm sitting opposite my ex at this very moment. Very tough to deal with.

Good luck all

[questionmark22]

This is a brilliant idea. So, I miss him dearly, I shouldnt', I should hate him for playing with my emotions and for running away from it all probably out of fear but I don't.

In truth, I miss him dearly. I miss the way we laughed, shared, talked and the way we enjoyed each others company. I shouldn't feel this way, we weren't even dating that long but I put my guard down and fell for him.

Now every time I hear the songs we used to listen to I get this plunging feeling in my heart but I know I'll move on and I'll look back and will be glad that this ended when it did rather than later for the pain to endure would have grown as we drew closer.

And the friends thing, it never works. I said yes, I tried but I know in my heart I just wanted to leave an avenue to get back together with you. And I'd get burned so all the avenues are now closed and Ill go on by !

[dancer4life]

I never saw the break-up coming...
He broke up with me 2 days after we had been talking about where our reception was going to be held...that's right, we were engaged.
We had everything planned, where we were getting married, where the reception was going to be. the rings, my bouquet, everything...
Said we were going paths were going seperate directions...bullshit!!!


He made me drive down the hour down to his house then i had to wait 2 frickin' hours for him to get home so he could break up with me!
I took his high school ring when he said we're through and chucked it at his head!!!
I told him "I get the guns and the $450 of ammo that I bought back."

Later on that day I called the local country radio station and requested "Didn't You Know How Much I Loved You" by Kellie Pickler
they asked who I wanted to send it out to. my reply: "Once the bastard hears the song, he'll know EXACTLY who it's for."they asked if I wanted to give him a message with the song. I said: "Yeah I do. Sweetie, you're REALLY gonna regret this one day."

this is part of a letter I wrote him. I'll never send it, but writing it helped me a bit...

I can't believe you did this to me. We had our entire lives planned together and without you in it, I feel like I have nothing. You were the reason I got up in the morning, you were the reason I breathed. You were everything I wanted and everything I needed. How could you? I still love you and I know I always will. Once day you really are going to regret the day that you broke everything off. and I hope I'm there to see it happen.
You know that if you came back today and asked me to forgive you I'd let you back into my life in a heartbeat. But that's never going to happen and that breaks my heart.
Have a good life, one day I'll find a REAL cowboy...one that treats better than you EVER did...and when that happens, I hope you're there to see what could've been yours. I hope you see how happy I am and I hope it hurts you as much as you breaking up with me hurt me...it's the least you deserve.

I hope this song {Didn't You Know How Much I Loved You} is burned in your brain for the rest of your life along with our engagement picture right beside it, so you NEVER forget when you were the happiest you've ever been and ever will be which was me by your side...after everything you put me through, it's the least you deserve.

You know that you'll always have a place in my heart, no matter how many times it gets broken.

[dancer4life]

You can never be friends with an EX... Never...Leads to problems, and if an ex owes you something... Learn to kiss it goodbye.

you can actually...my first ex broke up with me 4 months into the relationship. We gave each other distance for the first couple of months. but now we're the best of friends. We talk all the time now just about the most random stuff...

it is possible, it's just not for everyone...

[lostwithyou]

Dear Ex,

Why do I love you so much, with the holidays coming up all I want is for us to be together again. right now all I can do is try and move on without you. Take care of yourself.

Love,

[qwertz]

I have no desire to contact any of my ex's but just for kicks..i would say...

YOU HAVE A SMALL WEANER.

[lhn]

I was looking forward to xmas so much with you. Wanted us to spend it for the first time in our apartment all snugg on the sofa. So many dreams are gone and nothing seems to bother you.
I hate the fact I didn't get to see you last xmas but this one you'll be spending with HIM.
Don't know what else to say.

[lostwithyou]

I woke up this morning with a thought of you on my mind, I wanted to hear your voice, wanted to know how you're doing and what you're been up too? It kills me inside not being able to spend Thanksgiving this year with you. Where ever you are, I wish you great happiness. Take care of yourself ex.

[ChristianonLI]

Wow, any hope I had of getting my wife back is now gone. We had a huge hours long blowout in texts and at the end she demanded I never, ever contact her again and said she would stop responding to me permanently. And she is, I've tried texting her more but she will not answer me.

God, I cannot stop crying, this is bullsh*t. Our marriage fell apart after just three months, WTF? There's no telling how long it will be before I can find another woman who will so willingly accept the boring, poor and unaccomplished loser that I am. Chances are it will never happen again! I have nothing to offer a woman. I'm 30, I'm unemployed, I'm ugly, I rent an apartment in the basement of the house I grew up in...my wife accepted all of this (though the unemployed is only recent) and loved me.

And I f---ing ruined it all! I chased her out of my life and now she no longer loves me. Now she won't even TALK to me! This woman that I would die for, that made my life so meaningful for almost 3 years is moving on with her life and glad she's gotten rid of me. I don't think a value exists in mathematics to accurately describe just how much of a worthless excuse for a man I am. If I had a gun I would kill myself right now.

Edit: You know what, I don't need a gun. I have a car and a hose. Goodbye.

[lhn]

ChristianonLi...
You'll make it through. You really will. Looking to end it all is exactly what most of us have thought about, afterall, whats the point right?!!?

Well... I've learnt a lot from my breakup. I'm 25 in january so there is plenty of time left in life. You're not too much older.

Things I've realised since splitting:
> I had lost my drive for achievement. Nearly 25 and still no closer to a proper career or profession to get stuck into. Going nowhere fast.
> I didn't have any friends apart from those through her - not where I live anyway.
> I love being in a relationship. The closeness and the intimacy.

Things I'm doing to rectify my life so I don't go another 7 years down the same path:
> I've realised that nothing in life comes to you: you go to IT. After 2 months of thinking I've decided to persue a career in primary teaching. I'll be starting a 2 year course early next year whilst I work to gain the necessary qualifications. Its an aim and a goal and something I am absolutely buzzing to get into.
> I got a saturday job at a bar. I can't tell u how much I hated it for the first couple of weeks but now I am so glad to have met new people. DO IT!
> I've signed to a few websites to meet new people and get the ball rolling again. Sure, its a strange and new way of doing things but everyone on these sites are on there for the same reasons. Theres no need to be embarrassed.

So things are starting to look up. Take your life by the horns and realise that everything is a learning experience; there are always people out there worse off; and nothing ever happens without change. Everything is a choice. Make the right ones from now and you'll reach a new level of happiness.

[lostwithyou]

Why do I have the urge to contact my ex today. The feeling inside my stomach is turning. I feel lost and hopeless, just looking at the cell phone is very tempting. ITs been 7 days of NC for me and its killing me inside slowly. Please help, please tell me it gets better.

[lhn]

It does. It really does but you're at the beginning of a slow process. Its not easy but you'll get there. I promise u that