I can handle "NO", why can't guys be upfront?

[Mia123]

Fellas, I'm a mature women, comfortable in my own skin and fairly confident so rejection aint' a big deal but my first dabble in the dating game in 3yrs was so frustrating I'm seriously wondering if I'll bother again.

Friendly chap walks pass my place twice a day. Sometimes at the same time I'm walking the dogs. He stops and chats. Makes a fuss of the dogs. Waves if he sees me from a distance. I like him, I ask him out.. a walk on the beach with the dog. He gives me his number, says call Sunday am. I ring, he has been on a bender, hasn't had much sleep and has a hangover but says yes he'll come. We walk, we talk, we have lunch together (he pays).

Two days later another chance meeting, I've won in the Melbourne Cup sweep stake at work, he says "you should celebrate" I ask him to join me to share a bottle of wine. I didn't say exactly when. He assumes that night and says he has work to do first & to call him later (its 5.15). 5.30 to 6.pm I take dogs to park (he knows I do this every day). Get home and he has sent a msg "Heading over". I ring him to ask when did he send the msg. He sounds put out and says he saw me in the park so stayed home. I stupidly say I'll feed dogs & come to him. He replies don't worry about it I'm working now. End of call.

Since then we waved but no chance meetings.

Now I've got the message he isn't interested but why don't you guys just say no.. us big girls can handle it.

[bluesummer]

The games people play, huh. Well, if he doesn't want to be a big boy about it, all I can suggest is approaching him (instead of just waving!) at the park. Tell him you're sorry about the mix-up the other day and see if you can set up another chance. Maybe he's uncertain and feels like you're rejecting HIM.

[Mia123]

Games for sure. tonight (2wks post date) i get a sms "Have you been watching the matrix". I reply "Huh?!", he replied "Its GO! right now". I replied "What r u you about? I'm not watching tv". No response since. me thinks he still has my number in his contact list and whatever planet he is on tonight I just copped a taste of.

[bluesummer]

Ha ha, so he's a total space cadet, huh?

[Mia123]

Ok.. not for long. It went like this..

I txt this am, was the txt of the night before meant for me? That I liked him, wanted to get to know him and recognised that he didn't feel the same way. Could he just remove my phone no from his contact list. His reply "what a gloomy way to start the day and yes, txt were meant for me & why would he delete my no. Did I have a bad weekend" We back & forth txt msgs all am, both of us thinking the other is cranky with each other. Upshot, I ask if we can talk, clear the air. So he comes around tonight (only lives around the crnr). We have a beer, I do most of the talking whilst, once again he focuses alot of attention on the dogs. He tells me via the dog "mummy had a silly moment". He doesn't say alright that he feels the same way but says we are good. He thanks me for my hospitality and is gone.. I was jealous of the dog.. she was getting all the cuddles and kisses. Now I suppose I just have to wait and see right??

[IndiReloaded]

Both times you asked him out. Now its his turn to show initiative. If he can't be bothered, then move on. He's either not interested or wants to be chased. Either way, a headache for you.

Don't do the stupid 'delete my number' thing. That just looks like what it is--a pathetic attempt to get some control. There's nothing to control, either he's into you or not. If not, forget it.