She lied about everything.

[Doctor Sailboat]

Hello there.

Me and my girlfriend have been going out for 6 months until yesterday. We live right next door, are both half Asian, and have so much in common it is almost as if we are family. Around the 4 month mark, she admitted that she loved me one night when I was over. She always said before this, that she was against the whole "love thing", so I was skeptical. I asked her if she honestly meant it, and she confirmed it. Over the course of the relationship, I would ask questions like, "Is there anything I can improve on? Do I make you happy? Is there anything you would like to address?" Each time I always asked her to be completely honest, and each time she said everything was absolutely great.

She happens to have a friend who lives out of town, so they don't see each other that often. But every time she is with her, my girlfriend turns into an unimaginable monster. She will complain that I am whining if I suggest something like, "You guys wanna go inside?". She would tell me to shut up, tell me why she is wasting her time with me, order me around and just be an upright bitch. She would get mad over trivial things, such as my friends not having cell phones. She would actually get mad at me, for things not involving me. Absolute rubbish. However, after her friend was out of the picture she returned back to the normal lovable person I had fallen in love with.

Anyhow, on New Years eve we went to a party. For about 3 days before and at the party, my girlfriend had been hanging out with the friend I mentioned. It was fun and we all just had a good time. For some reason when the clock struck twelve o'clock, she didn't want to kiss me. I shrugged it off, we said our goodbyes and went home. She went to her friend's house.

The next morning, I contacted her. She replied with "I can't talk to you." Her friend then contacted me, saying that she was extremely angry with me. I kept asking why, but she wouldn't tell me because "its private". Later in the afternoon, she sends me a message over Facebook, reading "We're over". I asked why, and she said she just thought we were good friends the whole time, and didn't feel like we were actually dating. I ask some questions, and she claims to have lied about ever loving me, never liked our intimacy, and lied about just almost everything apart from enjoying my personality and company. She claims everything she lied about was caused by pressure.

I am very confused about why she lied. There was almost no pressure for her to do so. For everything we talked about, I asked her to answer me honestly. Yet she lied. How should I approach her again? She claims to like my company and personality, but never liked doing anything intimate.

Should I just forget about her and move on?
If we loved each other and her love was a lie, was it even true love?
Do you think her decision to end our relationship was based off her friend, and did she lie about lying about everything?
How should I approach her from now on? I still wish to be friends, is she even worth the time?

Any help is greatly appreciated.

[kez73]

Yikes, from how she acted around this friend in the past and added to what happened on New Year's, I would just back away and not even attempt a friendship let alone a relationship! she has shown you her Dark Side several times already - how many more times do you want to see it? Regardless if she was lying to you before, or is lying to you now - she is obviously lying and doesn't seem to care if it hurts you in the process. I would take this moment as it is and just walk away. She can go find other friends to push around and confuse instead.

[boobaa]

What an immature bitch! She doesn't deserve a friend if she lies like that, under pressure or not. It is not friendship, it is called using someone for comfort.

Another example of female liars, most of them are.

[soulsurvivor23]

Forget her!! Sounds just like what was done to me... She said she never really loved me, only considered me as a good friend despite saying she loves me every night for months... Don't bother with her and don't ever look back, she's not worth it!

[kai]

Move on buddy. Don't talk to her at all! No Facebook, no cell, not anything. She doesn't deserve you. You'll find a much better girl

[cmacattack1]

You don't want to ask her things like "What can I do to improve" and so on. Just from my personal experiences, but being a person with low self esteem, it's a pretty big turn off. Being confident is a good thing, and it sounded like when she got nasty she knew she could just walk all over you. And still is.

You have a right to get angry. You gave her yourself and wanted to make her happy, which is not a bad thing, but she is taking advantage of that fact. Do not put up with that. It's difficult because you love somebody but when they are wrong you have to acknowledge that fact. Sweeping it under the rug is going to breed resentment.

[Junket]

I agree you sounded insecure.

However, it sounds like she tried to convince herself that you were right for her because you were being textbook "nice", but in reality, that's not what she wanted. Unfortunately she took it out on you when it was she that was at fault because she wasn't being honest with herself, or you.

[IncognitoSir]

I agree you sounded insecure.

However, it sounds like she tried to convince herself that you were right for her because you were being textbook "nice", but in reality, that's not what she wanted. Unfortunately she took it out on you when it was she that was at fault because she wasn't being honest with herself, or you.

Even though you sounded insecure, I can see that you only were trying to address issues that she may have been purposely looking over. Like comfroting the problems head on, I get that. She was using you though and shes a liar so even though you're really into her, shes no good for you man.

[Coco]

She is immature and you are insecure and annoyed her by being insecure. I would have no contact with her.