i need some help....this is my situation:

[of.the.room.]

hello, everyone....i hope i can get some advice especially from women....this is my situation:

im 23 yrs old....i really dont have any trouble getting dates or meeting girls, but its really frustrating whats going on with me lately......i meet a girl, we have a lot of fun that night, we text each other all week, we go out again and then its like they lose interest...

my problem is that im very quiet and its not my fault, thats the way i am and girls dont seem to understand that im quiet.

two weeks ago, my friend says that this girl really likes me and wants to meet me.....so we went out to a bar, we were together all night, we kissed, we text each other all week, and last night, we went out again....this time we went out with more people.

we get to the club, shes really happy to see me, we talk for a little bit, but then my quietness kicks in and i suddenly start losing her...long story short, she ended the night with another guy.

so, this is not the first time it happens. so basically my question is, what should i do? should i pretend to be someone im not and pretend im very extroverted and that i love to dance (when i hate to dance)....or should i keep being myself....im not trying to change for anyone because i wanna be the way i am.

i dont understand, im not a jerk, i treat girls with a lot of respect but it seems that girls get bored because im quiet and i dont like to dance for example....sorry if this is too long, but i would really appreciate some points of view.

[TheWizard]

You're starting off good and then you're dropping the ball. You were cast aside because you weren't confident enough in yourself and some one else took advantage of the open window.

Being a nice guy as nothing to do with it, you can be a nice guy and still keep their attention. To answer your question yes, pretend you are an extrovert. Have energy, share laughs, be playful, touch her, talk to her, bust her balls a little bit be flirty. You have to do all the things that convey to her you aren't afraid, and that you're on the same level.

Being quiet because you're nervous reeks of inexperience and lack of confidence with women, and they don't find that attractive. I would work on your inner confidence so that when you are put in these situations you can take the lead like a man should - because really that's all the other guy did. He probably touched her a lot that night too while talking to her right?

[MVPlaya]

Bottomline is girls think you're boring. You're probably a good looking guy, you get female attention, but when it comes to it, girls lose interest quickly because you don't have a lot to say and don't share interest in a lot of the socializing they like.

Its easy, either step it up and become more sociable, or wait until you meet an introverted chick who is willing to settle for that (and believe me, introverted girls overwhelmingly prefer a sociable guy).

Your choice.

[of.the.room.]

interesting.....thanks a lot.....i guess i need to step my game up....i guess i have to start acting like someone im not!!!!!!!!!!!

[TheWizard]

you don't need to change who you are, you just need to make the effort to be more sociable. It's ok to be an extroverted-introvert. I'm one of those. I tend to prefer staying at home and indulging in my own hobbies most of the time but I put that aside and go out and socialize - it gets easier as you do it more.

[girl68]

interesting.....thanks a lot.....i guess i need to step my game up....i guess i have to start acting like someone im not!!!!!!!!!!!

Realize that you can't keep up this act forever. Not to mention girls aren't stupid she'll see through you fairly quickly.

So you're shy, you need to work on not being so shy that is NOT the same as pretending to be someone else. The sooner you realize that, the sooner you can work on your shyness, not 'pretending' to be someone else.

[Elle_Boogie]

There are females out there who will find your shyness cute and endearing. But it wouldn't hurt to be a little more talkative, b/c shyness can be confused with lack of confidence.