Men, do you think about your girl when you're not with them??

[Okay]

Hi guys,

Just curious... Also a bit frustrated, so all thoughts/angles on this welcome.
So.. you have a girl you love right? Be it your girlfriend, or wife. You've been with her for a while now, maybe it is the time of the relationship where you are the most comfortable with her.

So, you love spending time with her, whether it be everyday of the week or once a week, and when you are together everything is perfect and wonderful.
But...


Question 1 for men that fit into the category I have stated above.
Honestly how much do you think of your girl when you are not physically with her? Do you text/call her often, or not much (because you are too busy)? Is she on your mind every second, or only when she calls/texts you?

Question 2.
Truthfully, what is a mans priority in life? Is it his 'girl', his mates, or family. Or a delicate balance between all? And if it is such a balance, then how do you know you are not neglecting one party whilst pleasing the other?

Sorry about all the questions... just had to get it out there...
Please help me clear my thoughts...
and Thank You.

[Hillbilly]

I try to balance all aspects.,not always easy to do and you will never please everyone all of the time. Communication with your partner is very important whether it be a call or text from you.,it makes her feel cared for.

[IncognitoSir]

Well yeah, I think about her all the time, but there ust be a healthy balance of everything else as well. My life is more than my relationship with my gf, much much more and each aspect deserves it's time ya know. I always FIND or even make time to atleast say hi to my girl though seeing how she does mean a lot to me.

[1337lizard]

Unfortunately I put far too much time into my girlfriend. It was starting to hurt my academics actually. I text her constantly when she's not around and I think of her often. I've been trying to balance things out a lot more, it's just ridiculous how much I care about her. Never felt like this about another girl before so it's a little overwhelming, especially since it has carried on for so long. What about you? How often do you think about your man?

[Okay]

Thanks for the input

I asked those questions because I (like 1337Lizard) spend ALOT of my time thinking of or wanting to call/text my boyfriend. It's so weird, I care about him so (?too) much...

Everyday after I wake, every night before sleeping, he is on my mind. It's like I've been brainwashed by thoughts of him, but its because I love him so so much.
And the thing is... he loves me back just as much, though I do not know if I occupy his mind as much.

The thing you mentioned about texting your partners, just to say "Hi" and make them feel cared for etc. Sometimes I feel like that is lacking from my boyfriend, I don't feel he does it on purpose, but it's like he is...too busy with what is in front of him eg. his friends, his work etc, to remember to text me sometimes?

I've asked some close friends about somethings (female & male) and their take on it ranges from that he maybe just "not good at the relationship stuff" or that perhaps he doesn't put as much effort into the relationship as I do.

All in all I understand that communication is key, I have a few times expressed my unhappiness, and he is unhappy too if I am unhappy and does his best to change things, but it seems though it is better for a few weeks, then it starts going back to the way it was again.

So... technically, what is wrong. Are we both at fault..?
(I don't want to be the clingy freak girlfriend, whom everyone hates...)

[Gribble]

I try not to think too much about my girl when I'm not with her. I wouldn't want to neglect the girl I am with.

[Okay]

O_o For shame Mr gribble!

[vashti]

I try not to think too much about my girl when I'm not with her. I wouldn't want to neglect the girl I am with.

You're such a brat.

[1337lizard]

Hahaha, aww OP you're in the same situation as I am. It's great you've found someone you care about so much but let me just say that I have a hard time maintaining a balanced life style because of it and it's actually slightly damaging. First on your relationship - too much attention produces the "cling" factor. Second for the rest of your life. Career, friends, school, life ambitions, etc. My friendships have decomposed a bit because of how girl crazy I went for my girlfriend.

So I guess what I'm saying is that you should take a mere two minutes (It's all you need! Less time than brushing your teeth ) and think only about things that make you happy that don't involve him. Don't do anything but think about those things. Then, once you've got a hold on some things that are just ridiculously fun, see if you can go and do some more fun stuff like that. If it's something like hanging out with friends or going snowboarding, go do it! Just reconnect with yourself. In the long run you'll be a lot happier if you do. Just my personal experience.

[Coco]

Hahahaha Mc. Daddy Gribble <3

[Okay]

Yeah I really want to get out and tighten up the slowly loosening ends of all my friendships, that would help ..just that I'm ill at the moment... and have been for about 2 weeks now so it makes going anywhere hard.

I'm a bit worried. One of my close friends has advised me that my boyfriend is not right for me, and its making me shrivel up inside like a raisin... O_o
I think I have this problem, I have a hard time making decisions, so go to others for advice (hence why I'm here on this thread too), sometimes I'm jumping from one end to another.

[1337lizard]

If it's just one friend telling you this, you don't need to worry. It's when all your friends and family telling you this that you need to worry. And if a gaggle of girls get together to try and get you to break up, don't bother with that. There's something called social influence at work there, and it actually caused my girlfriend to break up with me more than once (she has a close knit group of friends that wanted her to break up with me so she would spend summer with them. UGH.) so I'm just going to say that you need to think about whether he is right for you on your own terms.

[Okay]

I see... I don't want to make any rash decisions. I just sometimes feel like I'm not 100% happy, so its weird for me, also because its my first real relationship, I never really am sure of what things are "supposed to be" like.

I've had talks with him before, but it just feels like..
Is it that thing???
Where the man becomes "comfortable" in the relationship, so is no longer is as bothered with making the same effort as initially. Like the effort just slowly diminishes like an old birthday candle..

[VincenzoG91]

Question 1 for men that fit into the category I have stated above.
Honestly how much do you think of your girl when you are not physically with her? Do you text/call her often, or not much (because you are too busy)? Is she on your mind every second, or only when she calls/texts you?

Question 2.
Truthfully, what is a mans priority in life? Is it his 'girl', his mates, or family. Or a delicate balance between all? And if it is such a balance, then how do you know you are not neglecting one party whilst pleasing the other?

1. I think of her often, but not constantly. We're both independent people, so we don't call or text each other a lot unless something specific is going on. She calls me two or three times a week at work to talk for a while during my lunch break. We trade the occasional text or email, several a week is typical.

2. The balance shifts, depending on what is going on, but generally she is tied with my job as my first priority, family is a close second, and friends come in third place. But I get together with my friends on a semi-regular basis, at least several times a month, and that tends to take priority if plans were made in advance.

It sounds like you're worried that he isn't paying enough attention to you. Rather than wait for things to change (for the better or worse), you should get assertive and tell him what you need from him. If he can't or won't make more time for you, then you need to decide if you're okay with that. Just don't be that clingy girlfriend that people can't stand. Don't neglect your own friends and family, and if you have too much time on your hands thinking about him, get a hobby.

[doppelgaenger]

Are you kidding? I worship her. She is a goddess. I have a golden statue of her in my closet!