Girfriend of 5 years....Break?

[Buldog1313]

Hello all,

I have recently been told by my girlfriend of 5+ years..The girl I was weeks away from asking to marry me (she doesnt know AND I havnt had the heart or manhood to tell her that) I just cant she crushed my heart and soal by telling me she wanted to take a break!!!!!!... she wants a break. I am a Minor League baseball player and I go to Spring training in March and I am gone for the season for 6 months. This girl and I have been through college together, love each other to death, and yet I have noticed for about a month or so she was distancing herself from me. We didnt make love nearly at all, She would go out and party with her friends excessively. I am not a controlling/ needy boyfriend at all....I let her do her thing and want her to be happy and have a great time!!!

We have been through everything, we hardly ever fight, and I know she loves me. I just dont understand the break. I mean when I am away for baseball I think about her all the time. I try to talk to her as much as I can (about 1-2 phonecalls a day). I Don't think there is another guy that has gotten in the way of us. I just need some advice on this....

Is she trying to gently dump me? Is the baseball and distance too much for her? I mean this is my last year i am going to play baseball because i want to start a life and actually make some money... I love this girl very much and I am devistated right now.

If anyone has any insight or recomendations for me...I mean i will give her space...I really do give her all the space she needs all the time anyhow...I just dont understand...She hangs out with her friends all the time and I am ok with that.

Please if anyone has any advice I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you in advance

[gartlas]

Strange , you sure its a healthy relationship though? Often not arguing means all the things you feel get bottled up , and you get frustrated . Only advice I can give you is dont call and text her much , else you violate the "her needing space". Oh and have you asked her why she wanted space? Or if anything had changed between you?

[Buldog1313]

Yes we have a healthy relationship... We don't fight that much because we have little arguments that get all of our fustration out and then we have amazing make up sex afterwards. I mean the night she told me she wanted to take a break we ended up having great sex after she and I both pretty much cried our eyes out...She keeps telling me that she is trying to distance herself from me because of the distance but I dont understand because I want to spend as much time with her as i possibly can and over the past week I havnt really called or text her and we have hung out once to watch The bachelor and it was awkward....

I have noticed that she has been distancing herself from me for about a month...Theres really nothing else thats different about our relationship....Her cousins are a little older than us and have texted me asking me to hang out with them...I MEAN I JSUT DONT GET IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[gartlas]

Chillax . Being frustrated doesnt help you. if she said its because of the distance when your moving off to play baseball you gotta sort out your priorities. If you leave for 6 months , Im pretty sure there wont be a relationship when you get back. If she's more important than the baseball then quit the team or whatever and tell her your gonna stick around. But only if your SURE she wants it not to end too . If not then say your goodbyes and move on.

[girl68]

She keeps saying the distance is hard blah blah blah... all you keep saying is I'm trying to spend as much time as possible. The thing here is that even though you're trying it isn't working. 6 months is a loooong damn time. I don't blame her for not being able to cope all that well. Though she should have known what was coming.

That's besides the point.

I think you need to try to talk to her before you go. Ask her if it's the distance? If it is you have 2 choices: you stop going or you go and you 2 have a clean breakup. Believe it or not the latter choice will be easier and better in the long run. If you stop doing your basball you will likely resent her for it and you'll end up breaking up in due time.

Talk.