Question

**CAM** · 11-02-10, 01:28 PM

My folks are older but in good health. I've always lived close by and want things to stay that way. A bachelor, of course

I may get a new job and move to another state. They say that they'll move too. Do you think that it is fair to them to have them move and have to reestablish themselves in a new place? Or should I just stick it out in the current job?

**vashti** · 11-02-10, 01:37 PM

Hmm... I don't think it is for anyone else to decide what is fair in their eyes. They love their son, and want to be near him as they get old. i don't blame them. I would do it, too. This does not obligate you to never move. Your parents are of sound mind - they get to make their own decisions.

**QueenofCorona** · 11-02-10, 01:44 PM

If this job would make you happy in your career and in your life in general then go for it. As long as your parents WANT to do this, no issue. Even older people need their change of pace and adventures. It might be win win for the both of you.

**CAM** · 11-02-10, 01:51 PM

Thanks. A very thoughtful comment. I love them very much, too.

**Illusional** · 11-02-10, 02:00 PM

i understand that these are your parents, by why are they trying to revolve their life around yours? you're not a child anymore and i think that you should pursue your career. if you don't like it, then you can always end up moving back. your parents should take this into consideration before jumping states. since if you end up hating this job, you'll be obligated to stick it out for your parents.

raverboy

**CAM** · 11-02-10, 02:16 PM

I have pursued my career and been extremely successful at it while still keeping close to family. The possible job would be a massive step up (like 200 rungs up the career ladder, literally)---while it is possible, I don't think that I'd hate the job.

They are important to me because they are the only friends I have in life. A few acquaintances, yes....but no other friends.

**IndiReloaded** · 11-02-10, 02:26 PM

Go for it, Cam. Your parents are adults able to make their own decisions. For all you know, they might be looking for a change. If its tied to new success for their son, all the better.

My son is an only. I could easily see us moving to live closer to him if I we were retired. Its nice to be close to your kids and why not? You are all lucky to have the option.

Congrats on the new position. I tried to PM but can't figure the new forum interface, Luddite am I. LOL.

**Gigabitch** · 11-02-10, 11:46 PM

You might be moving to a place that offers more to aging people anyway, CAM. What would their lifestyle be like in the new place?

**Illusional** · 12-02-10, 10:13 AM

personally i don't see anything wrong with your parents moving out of state to be closer to you. i only hope that you give you some time to settle things out and see how you like the new state before they actually pick up their bags and start anew.

raverboy

**Doc Durian** · 12-02-10, 10:20 AM

I can't advise on this as my family and I are all wanderers and could never imagine in a thousand years anything besides a few visits in this life and phone calls.

We're tight but not on the physical interaction side of things.

**CAM** · 13-02-10, 02:59 AM

Originally Posted by Gigabitch

You might be moving to a place that offers more to aging people anyway, CAM. What would their lifestyle be like in the new place?

Well, there is a chance that it would be more to their liking but I'd be further away, possibly. I guess we'd have to visit--they could come to stay with me and I could go to see them. I'd guess that we still see each other four days a week, but that seems like not enough compared to the way things are now. We're very very close.

I totally understood when McQueen said that his worse nightmare was dying before his parents. I'm sure that I'll survive but it will be very lonely. That day is coming but I hope that it is a long time from now.

See, I'm a dark soul. Success often means more regrets than it does happiness.

**Mish** · 13-02-10, 05:47 AM

Originally Posted by CAM

See, I'm a dark soul. Success often means more regrets than it does happiness.

Why is that do you think?

**IndiReloaded** · 13-02-10, 01:59 PM

Originally Posted by CAM

See, I'm a dark soul. Success often means more regrets than it does happiness.

No it doesn't. C, there are so very many who would be extremely happy to trade places with you. You are blessed beyond belief. Its an insult to those who are striving for what you have to mentally sneer at it. Take what life offers you Cam, and take it with gusto. The universe will be along to collect its cut soon enough.

**CAM** · 14-02-10, 12:48 AM

I don't know. I begrudge myself in love and in life in general. It almost seems hypocritical to be too human. Hence, my ending relationships before they fully bloom. Turning to a dark mood when accomplishment is recognized or rewarded. I feel better about my accomplishments before other humans recognize them. When someone is smiling at me in admiration or is listening to me speak, I feel very uncomfortable inside. When a woman is looking into my eyes full of satisfaction and joy to have been with me, I find it unnerving. On the outside, I am told that I'm cool as a cucumber and just fine. Inside, I'm very different. As a friend used to tell me, "Cameron, you are your own worst enemy."

**misombra** · 14-02-10, 12:57 AM

i think it would be good for you to get out of that town you live in. your parents will be happy to go with you, i'm sure. they want you to be happy and live a good life.

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