Go Elsewhere for sex

**Gigabitch** · 11-03-10, 10:44 PM

It depends on what the laws are like where he lives. Here, he'd have equal custody. In England, he'd get shafted. Where he's from, I have no idea.

Tell your wife you want it in writing.

**OneQuestion** · 11-03-10, 10:46 PM

Originally Posted by Petit Papillon

Why great visitation? Why mothers should always get the kids? I think the best parent should get the kids. Dunno which one of them is the best, but it doesn't have to be that mother always get the child. Sometimes mothers are more ****ed up than fathers in the end.

That is just how it works. I only got to see my dad two weekends a month...

And my dad hadn't done anything wrong. My parents were both stable adults. My dad made probably three times the amount of my mom, but my mom made a good salary too. Neither was violent or anything. But yea, only got to see my dad every 2 weeks from age 5 to like 14. After that saw him a little more.

Here, he'd have equal custody.

Unless the laws have changed, no he wouldn't

**Petit Papillon** · 11-03-10, 10:54 PM

Unless my future-maybe-ex husband would be some agressive bastard or a bad psycho, I wouldn't let him see his kids JUST twice a month. I would give him the right to see the kid as often as he and the kid would like to, unless he wouldn't care of course. It's sad to give child a dad JUST twice a month.

**rob258** · 11-03-10, 11:13 PM

Thanks all. I realy don't know what to do. I am from England (we live in London) so the custody rules would favour her.

The thing is I still love her - and even after all this she says she loves me (but how can she?). To be honest I am yearning so much for exciting sex when I can truly orgasm and we give each other pleasure it's stopping me from thinking clearly - and until she threw the spanner in the works about getting it elsewhere I had already concluded seperation would be the best option.

I can't see how she can still love me if she won't have meaningful sex - yes, we have been doing it, but within the rules laid out in my first post? I don't even know if another woman would look at me yet anyway - so it may be academic! (I've started suffering from very low self confidence in the last couple of years because of this).

**kisswithafist** · 11-03-10, 11:20 PM

hi rob, i live in the uk too im from wales.

I think she wants the family unit and not you. like you said she wants the holidays, friends, kids ect. and she cant be respected in them areas without a husband can she now!!

Put her straight!! tell her you want to leave that might make her realise and change her ways or say fine. then you know she dosent want you.

**misombra** · 11-03-10, 11:23 PM

you know you're not the first person who's come to this forum with this problem. i just don't get it. it seems like these women get on a power trip or something.

there was good advice given in that other thread that was similar to this one. i'll try and find it for you.

**sookie6** · 11-03-10, 11:28 PM

I think your wife is playing with fire. Sex is part of mariage and if she is refusing meaningful sex (as you put it) then you should consider separating.

If you cheat on her and she finds out she will have EVERYTHING from the divorce. It's tough to give advice on this but getting a mistress just to relieve yourself is so 'low life' all of this because of a real 'bitch' who used you to have kids...

**OneQuestion** · 11-03-10, 11:33 PM

If you cheat on her and she finds out she will have EVERYTHING from the divorce. It's tough to give advice on this but getting a mistress just to relieve yourself is so 'low life' all of this because of a real 'bitch' who used you to have kids...

actually, be very careful, maybe that is what she wants...

**kisswithafist** · 11-03-10, 11:41 PM

yeah i didnt think of it like that! this may very well be what she wants.

**Gigabitch** · 12-03-10, 12:25 AM

That's why he should get it in writing and file it with a lawyer.

**misombra** · 12-03-10, 12:27 AM

...a divorce lawyer.

**Chupacabras** · 12-03-10, 12:58 AM

And throw himself on the mercy of family court? Good luck with that.

**Gigabitch** · 12-03-10, 01:03 AM

With her sworn affidavit, he can feel free to find himself a mistress. Maybe they should allow for that in the family budget. Dinner and a hotel once a week for bumping uglies and gifts at Christmas, Valentine's Day and her birthday.

**misombra** · 12-03-10, 01:17 AM

Originally Posted by Chupacabras

And throw himself on the mercy of family court? Good luck with that.

oh yeah. family court. reason 1,790,789,543,000 not to get married.

**Kaius** · 12-03-10, 02:49 AM

We're almost the same age. I'm 35, and my soon-to-be-ex-wife is 38.
We were having problems before our 2nd child, yet we still had him.
There was no sex at all....not because she didn't want to, but because we didn't love each other anymore.
We have 2 little kids, ages 5 and 2. I moved out of the house on January 2nd. I wanted a divorce a long time
ago, but wanted to hold the family together for the kids. But I realized it was more damaging to be in a
loveless marriage. I am dating a woman in the same situation as me, and we are very happy.

My suggestion: get a divorce. The marriage is over already. dont cheat with a mistress.
walk out of this relationship with pride and courage. No need to be a cheater.
You would make the right woman very happy. You know what to do.

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