Transitioning from long time friend to dating...

[lifesabitch]

I'm debating on whether I should do it or not.

Background information:

I'm 22 and i've know this girl since I was 12. Basically when we first met there was instant attraction but of course at that age due to immaturity and a number of other factors we never got together. However we were really close friends for those 2 years we went to school together and kept in contact ever since. There have been a lot of ups and downs which I won't really get into that much, but anyways the point is recently we have now been in the same area and she and I are both thinking about giving things a try...

If we get together it could potentially be something very special that has a wonderful friendship as a base. But on the other hand, if we were to get together and it didn't work out what would happen to the friendship?

[Gigabitch]

In my experience, the friendship will be over unless there's no chemistry, and it sounds like that's not the case.

If you were really close, this might be more difficult, but you have years of being a little more distant than you were in school. I think this could work.

[lahnnabell]

What do you think would happen to the friendship? It would dissolve. No one can make the huge transition from "relationship to just friends" quickly, and it may even be more difficult for your situation given that you guys are trying to develop a romantic relationship out of years of friendship.

[lifesabitch]

So comment 1 = go for it and comment 2 = don't go for it?

[cmacattack1]

It depends on what you want. You want more than friends don't you? You understand the risks involved in that if it doesn't work out, your friendship goes along with it? You understand the benefits that only a good partner can provide that a friendship can't?

It's not an easy decision. But as most opposite sex best friends end up, one is going to develop feelings at some point likely. Keep in mind if things don't work out but you guys are both mature and responsible with dealing with relationships, a friendship after that could be very possible. That being some serious time apart, enough for both of you to get to another stage in your lives and let any residual hurt fade away. I'm not a crystal ball though. Anything can happen in the future.

I say go for it if you think you are ready. I think the benefits of a great girl always outweigh the risks.

[Gigabitch]

Go for it. Just realize that you can't go back to being friends as if nothing ever happened later.

[lifesabitch]

Thanks all, I think I will go for it. Life is about taking risks and i'd rather make that risk for something i've wanted for a long time now (and I think she wants too) rather than not take that chance and be in a friendship where i'm always wanting more. Whatever happens happens.

[cmacattack1]

Don't be looking back on the "what ifs" if some other guy comes along because you waited too long!