bf lookin at other women, what to do?

[mel2208]

me and my bf have been together just over 8 months now... the problem is when we are out i notice a lot of the time he will look at other women..not just a glance but an up and down look. Its really started to p iss me off now!! ... He tells me he loves me but he does hurt my feelings when he does this...is this normal? i just dont know how to deal with it...He tells me he doesnt look but i notice it a lot (even though he thinks i dont) also he only looks at certain women too.... I get upset by it....It makes me feel im not enough for him... what do i do??

[Gigabitch]

Act disgusted an embarrassed, not threatened. Tell him that you'd be dating a german shepherd if you wanted to go out in public with a dog. That behavior is disrespectful to you, to the women he's staring at and ultimately to himself as well. It doesn't mean you're not enough for him- most men love visual stimulation, even when they're head-over-heels, but his obnoxiously overt ogling is low-class and just plain sad. Tell him.

[LailaK]

Start looking at other men in a noticeable way. If he whines about that, tell him that now he knows how you feel.

[girl68]

Glancing is normal up and down is straight up rude.

[Krissykris]

I would tell him exactly what you told us. If he denies it, then so be it, the choice is up to you whether you want to be with some guy who disrespects you in public or dump him.

Or do what me and my friend use to do if our guys started looking at other girls infront of us. Go up to a guy and start talking to him, or while you're walking by a guy with your guy, tell the other guy he's hot or go "ooooo, me like".

It's funny and immature lol

[smsinhindi]

me and my bf have been together just over 8 months now... the problem is when we are out i notice a lot of the time he will look at other women..not just a glance but an up and down look. Its really started to p iss me off now!! ... He tells me he loves me but he does hurt my feelings when he does this...is this normal? i just dont know how to deal with it...He tells me he doesnt look but i notice it a lot (even though he thinks i dont) also he only looks at certain women too.... I get upset by it....It makes me feel im not enough for him... what do i do??

I think it very very normal.. more than 90% of male have this bad habbit, it is very difficult to get rid of it.
One think you can do is you too started to admire other men infront of him and see his reaction and when he complain about you then you can discuss why you have started doing this.. hope next time he will think a lot before looking at anyother women..

[girl68]

It's not that common. Glancing is... but staring and "checking out" (as in the up and down stare) is not that common at least not from a decent, respectful man who is in the precense of a woman.

[formatien]

Frankly, any many that claims he doesnt find other women attractive is a liar.

As far as looking at these attractive people especially with your gf/bf or spouse around.... thats a lack of self control and as someone said disrespectful...

Before you actually do it... Tell the person that if they are going to do it you will to, and next time they do it you do it also... so they see how it feels.

[lahnnabell]

I would tell him he can take me home and go out with the boys if he wants to disrespectfully ogle women like that. I get that boys will be boys, and they do that crap when they're out with the guys, but in my presence? You best believe I'm not tolerating that.

[the_robot]

I don't get most of the guys when they stare at girls like idiots... It's disrespectful to be staring at someone's chest for instance... specially if you are with the gf.

[mel2208]

One think you can do is you too started to admire other men infront of him and see his reaction and when he complain about you then you can discuss why you have started doing this.. hope next time he will think a lot before looking at anyother women..

thanks guys for your advice...Im glad im not the only one that thinks this is wrong!!
i think i will give him a taste of his own medicene and see how he feels...it hurts my feelings when he does this and i want him to understand how i feel when he does it..

Mel xx

[Kaius]

It's normal for men to look. Women look too!
Your man should do it more discreetly.
When I go out with my woman, I notice pretty ladies here and there.
I even point them out to her, and I tell her "I'm the lucky one...because I have the most beautiful girl".
Here's the interesting part.... I actually mean it 110%!!! My woman is the most gorgeous woman I have ever met....
She thinks I'm just blinded by love....but I honestly believe it! Someone should put me on a lie detector test, and it'll show that I'm telling the truth!

[WorkInProgress]

He tells me he loves me but he does hurt my feelings when he does this...is this normal?

I think it is rude and disrespectful. As a man, when I am with a woman, I NEVER look at other women! What I mean by this is, that I do not stare at women, or give them a 2nd glance. Why do I need to look at other women if I have a beautiful woman that I love by my side?

As for what should you do. Tell him how him looking at women makes you feel. IMO if he really cares about you he will change his behavior! Actions speak louder than words my friend.

[cmacattack1]

Some people are very oblvious, it's not so black and white that "oh if he cares he would just magically not do it." Some things need to be addressed and if you do and he still continues to do it, that's a sign he wasn't listening or he doesn't care.

I've never been that kind of person so it's hard for me to understand. Pretty immature behavior.

[lost_soul1]

first u should know that people looking at other people is normal... but yeah if he does the up and down thing he sounds kinda a like a jerk. some guys do it differently tho. just because he looks at other women, doesnt mean he thinks ur ugly or anything... he just has a wondering eye... and im not sayin thats a good thing or anything.
u should definatly bring it up next time he does it. just say something like "do you get motion sickness from doing that elevator eye thing all day or is it just an eye condition??"
that would probably piss him off
an then you could say "you know, im right here, and its actually pretty rude that your doing that right in front of me. you need to stop that shit."
dont be nice about it either. dont be timid.