Ending No Contact question

[amigoingcrazy]

I just split 4 days ago with my GF not for the first time , she made the choice and I realise she felt she needed to , I think this might be a good chance for both of us to "reset" ourselves so I am going for the no contact rule (I dont like games but think this is the best way to go while having a break) I was going to wait 3 weeks and was wondering if after that time ringing her to arrange to pick my things up from her house was a good reason for contact or does that smack of "give me my stuff I am out of here?" as I dont know any other ice breaker to arrange a meet up. A womans view on this would be great as I want some time to make myself a better person to restart the relationship

[xxazurexx]

It smacks of 'give me my stuff, I'm desperate to see you'....

That's what I'd think anyway.

If you wanted your stuff that bad, why not take it on the day she called it quits.

I'd know why you left your stuff.

For an excuse to come back and see me.

[amigoingcrazy]

whats a good ice breaker that doesnt say I am desperate , by then I was hoping she would like to see me or does the "game" still have to be played?

[xxazurexx]

whats a good ice breaker that doesnt say I am desperate , by then I was hoping she would like to see me or does the "game" still have to be played?

I'm a believer in that if you are dumped, it's down to the 'dumper' to make their way back. I have way too much pride and to run after someone who didn't want to be with me and they ended it. So I've never had to use the 'ice breaker' line and in order to reconnect.

You talk of not wanting to seem desperate, but the very fact you want to go pursuing someone who dumped you, kinda smells of 'desperation' and a lack of respect for yourself.

I dunno. I can't really think of anything one would say to a dumper and that didn't come across as 'desperate.

Guess the stuff at her place line, will have to do.

OR:

You could wait it out for a bit and see if she contacts you in regard to getting your stuff back.
Then she has contacted you first

[enfant terrible]

I just split 4 days ago with my GF not for the first time , she made the choice and I realise she felt she needed to , I think this might be a good chance for both of us to "reset" ourselves so I am going for the no contact rule (I dont like games but think this is the best way to go while having a break) I was going to wait 3 weeks and was wondering if after that time ringing her to arrange to pick my things up from her house was a good reason for contact or does that smack of "give me my stuff I am out of here?" as I dont know any other ice breaker to arrange a meet up. A womans view on this would be great as I want some time to make myself a better person to restart the relationship

Ok, so let me get this straight - the two of you are having a break, or is that only in your fantasy when the reality is that she completely dumped you? If you want the slighetst chance of getting her back then you should'nt be chasing her, and contacting her all desperate like that. She dumped you, meaning she didn't want you and it's up to her to come back to you if that's what she wants. Because I promise you, that if girl really loves you she will come crawling for you, sooner or later. If she doesn't do that, then you're nothing to her.

[amigoingcrazy]

We have split about 4 times before each time she came back of her own doing (we were still in contact that time) each time was a split not a having a break , this time before we split the main problem was sorted out however she said she was stressed out and tired so wanted to "cut the cause ie me , (I fell the split was affected by how she felt about the stresses we had in the relationship and not her feelings for me ) " I want to give the no contact a go to allow us both to reset , thought of giving it a month then contacting her for my things then feeling the water so to speak if in that time she hasnt contacted me.