Help. Please!

[flavaflave]

Hey.

I'm really sorry if I'm not posting in the right part, but I am in desperate need of help.
I have been with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years, and last night broke up with him. I broke up with him because he has completely changed me as a person. I am now insecure, introverted upon many other things. I also found a conversation he had had with a girl on the internet (it was on my computer, as I save my chat logs) He was telling her he loved her, asking for pictures of her (non-sexual) and telling her she was beautiful. I confronted him about this, and said sorry for reading it, but he promised me that he stopped talking to this girl months ago, as he left an email up and obviously, being as it was there I read it... I'm sorry if I sound rather invasive. She was telling him how much she liked him, and I don't know what he replied as I thought it was his place to tell me. He also said to the girl on the chat that he wasn't happy with me, and that he wishes she wasn't on the other side of the world. When I told him about it he said to me that he was only being nice to her and trying to make her feel better. And that he thought it would be okay because I wouldn't ever find out. This has made me lose my trust in him. Now he is calling and telling me he can fix everything, and be the man I wanted him to be. And obviously, still being in love with him I want to give it another go. I;m not asking for people to tell me what to do, I just want an outsiders' opinion, and if anyone has had any experiences with this.

Thank you for reading.

Kim

[girl68]

I would have walked away too. Those conversations are completely inappropriate. Good riddens.

[sparkles]

I know you still love him but after finding out what he has been up to, can you fully trust him? Has there been any problems in your relationship lately? Maybe you should find out why he felt the need to go on the site in the first instance.

You don't say why he makes you feel insecure? Is he controlling?

[flavaflave]

Hey. Yes he is very controlling. I can't remember if I said in the original post, but he also said that he loves her... =/

[girl68]

Don't go back. Any respecting man would not do this.

[MM894]

Well to start with, I don't think it's right that you're reading his stuff without his permission, it's an invasion of privacy, and clearly indicates you didn't trust him to begin with before you saw any of these conversations.

That said, what's done is done, and if he's saying that kind of stuff to another girl then you're absolutely right to leave him. As a guy I don't think I'd carry on a conversation like that with a girl, telling her I loved her or anything, if I'm in a relationship with someone else. The fact that he also said, behind your back, that he wasn't happy with you means there's not much question that you're right to break up with him.

[flavaflave]

I know Reading his things without his permission is wrong, and I hate myself for doing it. Thank you firthe replies. I really appreciate this. It's a hard decision, as I really do love him. He won't stop contacting me, but I'm worried as he has told me before he's had suicidal thoughts. I'm worried about him.

[bah]

This man is a typical cheater and liar. Words make no difference, action does. And he basically cheated on you with a girl over the internet. Kick his ass to the curb and don't feel guilty for finding out.